Comical Relations
by The Brod Road
Summary: A surprising turn of events on a typical night of ghostly crime fighting causes Danny to think about current events in life. It seems so similar to something... Danny/Ember. Chapter 7 is here. What happened to Danny/Sam? Here's an answer!
1. Comical Relations

Author's Note: So, there is a small creative flame left during this case of writer's block after all! Good! Anyways, just a small idea I suddenly had. Hopefully, this might help me return to my other projects…

This is my first Danny Phantom fanfic. Also, yes, I like both Danny/Sam and Danny/Ember, but this story is strictly D/E. I dunno what it is, but there's a certain vibe about that pairing. It reminds me of another, more-famous pairing involving a superhero and a villainess…

Disclaimer: This is a disclaimer. It says I don't own this show, nor do I own any piece of media mentioned here. Now comes the story.

Comical Relations

It was strange. Danny had read plenty of comic books before and even had to concur that some certain aspects of his superhero career could make him fit for his own series, but sometimes, he could only wonder about the small things.

Part of one such 'small thing' was the ghostly crime scene below his position.

It was supposed to be a lazy Tuesday evening in Amity Park, but the peace was broken by none other than Technus. The dubious "mechromancer", as Team Phantom had taken to dubbing his ghoulish occupation after playing through Borderlands 2, had attacked a music store after hearing of a large shipment of newly-released instruments of the high-tech variety.

It was to be chronicled in the Phantom Database's file on memorable incidents (mainly kept for laughs, unless something serious happened) that Technus had wanted the shipment so that his own self-made theme music would play wherever he went… By far, his worst scheme since his attempt to weaponize Dubstep in another quest for relevance.

But the Godfried-voiced ghoul's motive wasn't on Danny's mind at the moment. No, it was the fact that he had arrived at the crime scene…with the undead criminal in question already knocked out on the ground, chunks of debris and burn marks everywhere, and a few citizens milling about as if the fight had ended a short while ago. He lowered himself to the ground to deal with Technus.

Granted, the black-n-white hero would normally attribute such incidents to the Red Huntress. But being a superhero for a few years taught him to be very observant of things. For instance, Valerie wouldn't leave such a mess behind, nor was she messy in combat, despite her firepower appearing to be otherwise. Secondly, she wouldn't just leave a ghost behind to possibly recover and escape.

Thirdly, and most importantly, was the occasional little embers of fire that flickered near some of the burn marks. Blue fire… He smirked as he uncapped his Fenton Thermos to formally 'arrest' Technus. She was on the prowl again…

Thinking of the situation while securing the Thermos to his back, he was reminded of a specific comic series. One a lot of people knew well, or at least heard of… Hearing sirens in the distance, he took to the air. Better let the emergency crews handle their own business without some ghost getting in the way. Funny, leaving the wrapped-up crime scene before police arrived also seemed like such a familiar scenario.

As he flew over the actual park that the town was named after, he couldn't help but feel… anxious? Worried? Curious? After all, when one deals with a loose cannon like her, expect the unexpected. Had he heard that phrase somewhere before?

Thankfully, the flight home was uninterrupted, which was another stroke of good fortune. Phasing his way to the basement, he floated over to the Ghost Portal and injected the Thermos in its usual slot. 'Another one sent back to the Asylum' he thought dryly. 'Heh… That's an odd way of thinking of the Ghost Zone.'

"Like your 'gift', Baby-Pop?" chimed a mischievous voice from behind him. Again… She snuck up on him again. Weird, since the voice's owner loved being loud. Perhaps she liked trying to startle him…

"Ha. That's hardly a gift, flame. Had to return it. Besides, it left quite a wreck for the cops." Danny replied, his eyes lightening up (more than usual) with amusement as he turned toward his company.

"Who the hell said Technus was a gift, Dipstick? Well, other than he himself anyway, the self-promoting asshat…" said Ember, grinning, her fiery hair flickering in its own particular pleasure. Her guitar was slung over her back like a battle axe, standing out in comparison to her body and skin-tight black shorts, tank top, and boots. "I meant the fact that you didn't have to do any work tonight."

"Well, that's a plus, I'll give you that. However… Ya still can't call it a gift." the halfa said, crossing his arms, looking serious. Ember raised an eyebrow.

"Why not?"

"Explain those two amps behind you? I know those aren't any of your personal equipment. Not to mention, they look pretty fancy…" he said, accusatory at first, but lightening up at the end, drawing out 'pretty fancy' in a mocking, sing-song voice. His smirk could not be any more cheeky.

"Aw, c'mon, hero boy. I just consider this my payment-in-advance for my 'protection services'." Now he knew he heard that sort of reasoning before.

"Sigh… Well, I guess I could let you get away with this. I'd say you've earned something for not trying to take over the world."

"Dipstick, I already got my reward for quitting the crime stuff." she simply replied in a mock-annoyed tone, winking at him. Danny blushed a little.

"Uhh… Well then… Gift exchange?"

"Sure, Baby-Pop. Besides, isn't it time for an anniversary anyway?" she said, chuckling at him.

"Ember, it's been only… hmm… 5 months!"

"You forgot…" she said, turning her back on him, her head held up high with a light 'hmph!'.

"Ember!" he groaned, throwing his hands up in exasperation. The rock star burst out laughing. She could never resist teasing the poor boy… no, young man. Danny took her in his arms, turned her around, and glared at her. But his eyes told her a different story.

"Don't make me return those amps, babe." he said, before planting his lips on hers. Her blue hair flared up in excitement, like always. Danny mentally had to laugh at the situation. He, the hero, role model, and town protector, letting his morally-questionable girlfriend get away with stolen merchandise after she saved the city from evil…

That cinched it…

He knew how it feels to be Batman with Catwoman around. Only without the brooding, of course.

Author's Note: And there it is. I typed this up in one sitting with nothing but the basic fic idea and sheer nerve. And all I did for editing was spell-check, cause I like what I got down. So, I hope this goes well.

First off, like a lot of people, I love the idea of Batman/Catwoman. If only Bats would just get the hint already… I mean, for instance, he worried about Arkham inmates targeting her to get to him? She can fight for herself! Problem pretty much solved! (except for ambush attacks, of course…) Then, there's his extreme sense of duty… and the brooding. Lol.

Anyways, I had this thought of a quick fic that somehow compares Danny/Ember with Bat/Cat, since both pairing ideas are kinda the same concept: "Good Guy meets Bad Girl, Good Guy defeats Bad Girl a few times, Bad Girl decides to walk the line between good and evil and sometimes flirts with Good Guy, Good Guy is possibly interested". (That's a lot for a 'quick' description… Lol.) Therefore, why not give Danny and Ember a "Bat/Cat moment"!

Please review and let me know what you think! Hope you enjoyed it.


	2. The More Things Change

Author's Note: Whoa… People like this! That's pretty kickass, actually. Thanks, everyone! I was going to have that just be a one-shot, but since you asked nicely, I'll give another part of this story a try, see if I can strike gold again.

Disclaimer: Still don't own anything used here.

Comical Relations Part 2: The More Things Change…

7 months. That is how long its been since things started changing in Amity Park. It used to be so simple… The town could count on either the Phantom or the Red Huntress to swoop in and save the day from clearly-evil threats of the undead sort. But it was not to remain so basic. That was made evident all those months ago by the sudden betrayal of Ember McLain on the mostly-mechanical hunter, Skulker, during a brutal double-team attack on Amity Park.

To this day, the little blob insists that the Phantom and the "Bitch" were in cahoots on the betrayal the whole time. Bruised hunter ego aside, the truth was that Team Phantom was just as surprised when, instead of crushing Phantom's skull in, she suddenly smashed Skulker's "head" off with her guitar mid-battle, dumping him in the process before flying off to who-knows-where.

All Sam would say about it was that she'd "almost pity the next guy she got her claws into. Almost.". Tucker groaned, wishing he'd gotten the moment on his PDA. "What can I say? It was a sweet shot! Bam, off with his helmet!" he reasoned as he contained the unconscious green blob within his Fenton Thermos.

Danny had considered it luck at first. Hell, part of him still considers it a result of mere chance that she did what she did. After all, what if Skulker had actually cared for her and treated her right? What then? Only Clockwork knew… Either way, he felt like he deserved some sort of explanation.

Boy, did he get one… A black eye later, Danny learned the hard way that upset women sometimes just needed some space. Not to mention, the whole "heroes/villains" thing… Not surprising that Ember would punch first and ask questions later, considering that she most likely thought he tracked her down just to throw her back to the Ghost Zone. It took Danny throwing his one empty Fenton Thermos up in the air and shooting it to bits to prove to her that he wasn't going to drag her back yet. (Good thing the family made quite a few!)

"Fine, so you're not going to 'cuff' me, 'officer'… What's your point?" she growled, in full-on rebellious teenager mode.

"Ember, I… well… Why?" Danny never thought he'd actually get very far with her about talking. So, he just asked the first thing that came to mind.

"It wasn't to become some damn goody-goody, if that's what you're thinking. I just had enough of his bullshit… All day long, he'd talk about hunting this and shooting that, not to mention his damn fixation on destroying you. To be honest, it almost made me wonder if he's… you know… 'in the closet', if you get what I mean…" she grumbled.

"Ok, that's disturbing…" Danny couldn't help but feel a little green at the thought of the green blob having a boyfriend, indulging in a hunting fetish in bed… Scratch that, he felt VERY green. Truly disturbing…

Ember couldn't help snickering at his reaction. "Ha ha. Dipstick can't handle being 'poached'?" She sneered. After all, they were still enemies…

"Not helping!" He never thought anyone could have the urge to vomit just from hearing a description of something…

Ember just watched intently as her nemesis' admittedly-nice-looking face contorted in disgust while clearing the nasty image from his mind.

"Ugh… So, anyway… Point taken, he was a crappy boyfriend. Well… man, this is awkward… I think you did the right thing for yourself."

"Pfft… You're only saying that because what I did kept you alive." Ember scoffed. 'Of course, he'd call anything that saved his life 'the right move'. Self-righteous prick…' her mind railed, flaring her temper again.

"No, really... Why put up with someone that won't be there for you? I bet he refused to hear you perform any new songs."

Ember remained silent. He had her there.

"How about him doing anything together that YOU like doing?"

Ember glared. Again, he was right.

"Did he forget your birth—"

"ALRIGHT! So you understand how it was the right move! Just happened to be at a great time for you! I assure you, it's merely coincidence…" Ember growled, taking out her guitar, prepared to fly off again.

"Hey, I'm just trying to help…" Danny said, almost offended, a frown on his face. Ember hovered in the air.

"Persistent, aren't you?" Ember looked down upon her enemy, suddenly wondering if he was really as big an asshole as she thought. It wasn't like he demanded a fight or anything…

"There's two sides to every story, Ember. Some say you're pure evil. Others say you're just misunderstood. So far, I don't see any evil. Just a girl who's tired of being played." The halfa spoke, almost sage-like. Totally worthy of a dramatic comic book scene…

"Although I've never had anybody say that to my face before, which is actually kinda… nice, for a change… You sure do go for those cheesy sentimental kind of lines, don'cha, Baby-Pop?" the diva said, laughing. Not an evil laugh (alright, maybe a little), but more of an amused laugh. She couldn't help but be amused when his shoulders slumped and his face fell in what he perceived as failure.

"Aw, c'mon… I was trying!" he griped, almost like a normal annoyed teenager without any superhero problems to worry about.

"Keep trying, Dipstick. You'll come up with something original someday!" she guffawed as she flew off. Danny shook his head, at least content with the fact that his 'moment' managed to lift her sour mood, at least so he believed. Like he said, he never really thought of her as a true villain. More like a rival, at the time… That opinion of her would change over the course of time.

Fast-forward to present day…

If there's one thing that was truly stupefying about Amity Park, it was the lack of common sense with criminals. Most criminals with brains would probably think twice about doing anything illegal in a town where superpowered vigilantes roam the streets, apparently saving lives and generally helping uphold the "dreaded" law.

Not Amity's criminals. They still try anyway! Case in point, what seemed like a cool summer Thursday night…The quiet was interrupted by the classic cry for help from a young woman, trying to escape on foot through the Park from the pursuit of a jilted boyfriend who got a little too grabby for her tastes…

"Come on, baby. You know you want the D!" came the cocky response (no pun intended) of said soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend. He seemed to be gaining on her…

"NO! I told you, I'm not ready! SOMEBODY HELP ME!" she shrieked, pushing her legs to run faster. Faster, must go faster.

"Well, I'M ready! Does that mean nothing?!" he said, getting irritated with the chase.

C'mon, legs, go faster!

As it turned out, she would soon get some deserved rest.

"I'm gonna get me a great slice of 'pie', baby! You'll love it! Just wait and…" the randy rapist was interrupted by a loud guitar chord, the very sound waves of which knocked him over, sending him tumbling a few feet. The woman shrieked in fright, wondering if one of the town's many super-criminals decided to 'have some fun'. Quickly getting behind a nearby tree, she dared a look back to see what was going on.

To her fear, it was indeed a ghost. A pale ghost-girl in a mostly black punk-rocker outfit with blue hair flickering like fire and a glare like cold ice. However, the glare seemed to be directed toward her pushy ex.

"Wha… Wha, what the hell…? What's your problem…?!" the schmuck said, voice quivering between indignation and cowardice. The blue/pale-white specter, custom guitar in hand, hovered closer, her mouth seemed to snarl even more.

"The lady said no, dirtbag…" Ember simply said, slowly hovering closer. She'd definitely have fun with this clown…

"But, but, but, but she'd like it! She's just shy, that's all! Ya don't know if ya like something until you try it, brah!" he stammered, his defense as frail as his legs seemed to be, seeing as he could do nothing but push himself backward with his hands, scared. Ember's eyes glowed fiercely. It was guys like this she couldn't stand. Especially since… no, that was then… It's over now. But that didn't mean she could just let things like this go unanswered.

She adjusted her grip on her guitar so that she was holding it like an axe instead of a musical instrument, something she normally resorted for close combat against other ghosts… Horndogs tend to only understand lessons in one way: the hard way…

"No! Please, no! I'll leave her be! Alright?! Please! I'll leave! No, what're you doing?! Please!" his begging kept going as Ember approached, raising her glowing, power-infused 'axe' overhead. The poor goon didn't know whether she'd aim for his head or his… 'smaller head'… Either way seemed to spell doom.

…Until a white-gloved hand gently-but-firmly landed on Ember's shoulder. She stopped, knowing who would have the nerve to casually place a hand there…

"You know better, flame…" Phantom said in a low voice, trying to keep the conversation between him and her.

"But… but he… he was gonna…" she stammered. She knew she let him down. If he wasn't nearby, she would've created one more patient for the emergency room. Danny sighed.

"I know what he was gonna do… That's why he's going to jail." As he said this, he quickly went over, grabbed the two-bit 'bro' by his shirt collar, lifted him onto his feet, put his arms behind his back, and used his ice powers to create solid 'ice handcuffs' to restrain him.

"Yaah! Damn, that's cold! Brrr… You can't do this to me, bro! I got rights!" the freezing jerk said, trying to muscle his arms out from the ice cuffs.

"Yeah? And we got witnesses. The woman you were chasing, for example. Then, there's me." The fact that Phantom was pretty much accepted by the town and thus had credibility wasn't lost on the offender.

"And me!" Ember chimed in gruffly. The town was still quite unsure about Danny's wild new 'teammate', considering the damages her 'heroics' tended to cause, not to mention the stolen music-related items she'd claim as 'rewards'…but perhaps, if this goes to court, her word would be accepted as long as she testified with Danny? Maybe. It would be an odd situation. Still, it was more trouble for the goon.

"Come on, guys! I'm tellin' ya, she's ready for it! She just doesn't know the thrill, bro!" the slimeball whined, wriggling in Phantom's grasp as he held him in place by his shirt collar.

"Are you out of your mind? Women aren't sex toys!" was Phantom's stern response, his green eyes glowing. The perp let out a distinct, unmanly "Eep!".

"You're so lucky Phantom just happened to be in the area. Otherwise, you would have had a painful time learning that women are just as human as you dumbass males!" Ember added, floating away to calm herself down.

The sound of sirens could be heard approaching from the distance. The scared woman must've called the cops. Good for Phantom. "I hope you remember the lesson learned here today." he said, sighing afterward as he delivered a light (for him) punch to the side of the goon's head, knocking him out so he wouldn't be a problem for the cops to handle.

Looking around, he noticed the frightened woman the pervert was chasing, still hiding behind the tree. He flew over to her. "Are you alright, ma'am?"

"Y…yes… Thank you…" The petite blonde was quivering. It was understandable how Ember's actions would leave people a little nervous about the ghosts' intentions.

"Er… Sorry about Ember. Her attitude, I mean…" Danny began feeling awkward. Did Batman ever have to set the record straight to people about Catwoman?

"Yeah, that's… That's fine. Umm… She had a rough love life too?"

"That obvious, huh?" Danny said, a light smirk on his face. Thank God for icebreakers. The woman seemed to lose her nervousness at the somewhat-surprised tone of his question.

"You kidding? Some woman goes apeshit on a random guy stalking a woman, how can you not at least consider the possibility?"

"Got me there." With that, the rest of the event was a typical comic book crime scene 'wrap-up'. Cops arrive, criminal gets thrown into the back seat of a police cruiser, police get statements from both Phantom and the would-be victim, cops inform Phantom that he should 'keep an eye on Ember', the woman thanks Phantom again for the rescue and asks that he say thanks to Ember for her as well, Phantom flies off for the night.

It wasn't often that Ember was distressed. At least it wasn't often since their relationship began, anyway… But he figured that the first thing to do to look for her would be to check her favorite Amity Park haunts. Pun totally intended…

The music store turned up empty, as did the concert hall, her favorite spot in the Park (a small clearing, appearing to be separate from the rest of the park), and even the roof of the tallest building downtown (she liked the view). With a sigh, he started for home.

As he flew, he passed over the movie theater. Glimpsing down at it, he had a thought. This late at night, it shouldn't be packed with many people, if any… Phasing invisibly through each of the theater rooms, his hunch proved correct when he saw Ember, glowing hair and all, sitting all alone in the spacious room while watching the late, late, late showing of the new X-Men movie. Ah, movies, the power of escapism!

He floated over, sat in the seat next to hers, and willed himself visible. Ember wasn't surprised, the frown and thousand-yard-stare going unchanged. She knew he'd find her eventually…

"Em?... You alright?" He didn't know where to start. Comic book heroes seemed to know what to say to their lovers. Well, except maybe Spider-Man. He's kinda awkward too.

"Oh yeah… I'm fine for somebody that almost murdered someone in cold blood… Just peachy, thanks for asking." Yep, she was sore and kicking herself, covering it with sarcasm…

"Ya know what? It's fine. Don't sweat it" the halfa answered, daring to put an arm around her in that classic "watching a movie with a date" maneuver. Ember looked at him, eyebrow raised.

"What? No noble speech about how I let you down or how lucky it was that you just happened to be flying about on patrol?" She wondered whether she should throw his arm off her or not.

"Nope. I understand why you reacted like that. I also understand that it's kinda hard for former villains to change their ways completely, not that I'm expecting a 100% different Ember, of course. That'd be kinda…not you. I enjoy how you are. I'm just saying that old habits die hard, ya know. I mean, hey, things worked out, right?"

She decided that his arm stays. "Yeah? Well, I understand that you still can't think of something originally clever, Baby-Pop…" she muttered, knowing that the dig about originality would probably hit a nerve. She knew it did when Danny responded with a low grunt. It was their running gag and they enjoyed it, in their own strange way. Almost like Batman and Catwoman seemed to enjoy physically fighting each other occasionally…

"But still, I'll give you a little credit for being such a flatterer." she said, leaning into him while still half-heartedly watching the movie. The duo resigned themselves to watching the mutant action on the screen.

In truth, a part of Danny wanted to consider this incident another stroke of chance, this time with him saving her from a dark path. The same part of him was a little disappointed that she was so tempted. But some erudite lecture wasn't what was needed, not for her. Especially since he still remembers a certain dark moment of his comic-esque career involving his own dark side… What was needed was caring and forgiveness, as corny as that sounded. It would take some time for Ember to return to her usual, loud, spunky self, but for Danny, any progress was good progress.

Two days later, he definitely knew she was feeling better. The Fenton Turntables, part of a strange theory that Jack had thought up about music luring in ghosts, ended up stolen at some point in the day. On Danny's desk, there was simply a note saying _"Thanks for the sweet turntables, Baby-Pop. Consider that your 'cheer up' gift to me. Love, Ember, Queen of Rock!" _He couldn't help but smile and shake his head. Why turntables? Was she thinking of becoming a DJ?

He began to wonder if he would ever have some semblance of a normal life. Then he realized that he probably wouldn't, because… hadn't most superheroes asked themselves that very question at least once? He then began to wonder how well a comic book series about him would sell…

Author's Note: Part 2, done! I think I did a good job, but I'm not sure. Feel free to chime in and let me know. Thank you. By the way, I admit that I probably should've come up with names for the scared woman and the horny bro, but I'd probably end up using names that've been used a thousand freakin' times or something. Pardon me for that!

On a side note, never been one for self-promotion, but perhaps I should give it a shot. Ahem… If any of you DP fans also happen to like Teen Titans and/or Beetlejuice (cartoon version), check out my other recent works!

"Raven Can Be A Real Witch Sometimes" - A Beast Boy/Raven fic about Raven finding a suitable costume for Halloween. Hilarity and pop-culture references ensue.

"Grim Reminder (And Other One-Shots)" – A series of loosely-connected one-shots which are mainly BB/Rae with hints of Robin/Starfire. The running gag of these is that each of the stories have something to do with aspects of pro-wrestling (You know, the WWE).

"Silent Payback" – A Beetlejuice/Silent Hill semi-crossover fic about what happens when Beetlejuice's enemies somehow curse Lydia's hometown of Peaceful Pines to have the same demonic problems as Silent Hill. Will be a BJ/Lydia pairing. Currently, on hiatus but I'm hoping to get back on track on this one. Perhaps some reviews can spark some inspiration?

If you look at my profile, I know there's a few other fics I wrote/tried to write. Those were from years ago when I was younger. If you want to see rookie writing, feel free. Lol. No regrets.

Anyways, feel free to review! It'll be much appreciated.


	3. Return of the Villain

Author's Note: I guess I'm striking gold here. Alright! I'm gonna try a third chapter and see if I can keep the quality going. As much as I also ship Danny/Sam, I wish there were more Danny/Ember fics that could actually explore the relationship instead of just the hooking-up part. I mean, why not? Right?

Anyways, going with the comic book theme, I was inspired to actually make fun of a certain aspect of a certain Fruit Loop… Makes me wonder if Marvel actually said anything about this. Lol. Obviously, there's going to be some Phantom Rocker goodness, but let's face it. What 'comic book series' is complete without the dreaded "guess who's back?!" storyline? This one's going to be more humor than anything else, since I'm mainly just pulling a storyline out of my hat based around one little comparison. Those that're used to the way the last two chapters were, I hope you like the comedy.

Disclaimer: You know the drill. Don't own anything.

Part 3: The Return of the Revenge Of The Returning Villain Plotline…Returns!

'God, are you there? It's me, Deadpool… or at least it seems that way!' was the dazed, frantic thought that came out of nowhere in the mind of one Danny Phantom as he stared up at the familiar monstrosity floating above him. Everyone in the loop of the ever-growing chronicle that is his life had thought they had seen the last of Vlad Plasmius, publicly known as Vlad Masters.

Ever since the ambush in the form of a sucker-punch that surely broke Danny's jaw when he decided to "announce" his return from space minutes ago, Danny had decided enough was enough. Plasmius, Masters, it didn't matter what the hell his name was. Looking upon Vlad's history with the Fentons and his obvious motives, the fact was practically in plain sight and needed to be stated.

Danny biggest nemesis was nothing more than a Doctor Doom knock-off.

Now, freeze-frame a second, readers. Think about it. An accident in college between best friends… The victim blames the best friend… Gains superpowers and dedicates his life toward villainy and vengeance… Constantly gives Danny trouble solely because of his last name. For crying out loud, Vlad has enough money to practically own a small country…ahem…like Doctor Doom does… My name might as well be Reed Richards Jr. Dammit, Dad, why'd you screw up that experiment…?

Now back to the action… Wait a second…

Why am I suddenly reading text? Like my life is a story?

And why is there a voice in my head reading said text in a deep, friendly, narrator-type voice?

What? Me? No, that's just your hero side, from that time we split forms using the Fenton Dream Catcher.

Oh. Hey, what's up?

Not much. Hey, got any movies up here?

What?

In your head. Got any entertainment? Even hero complexes get bored after a while.

All I got are thoughts!

Oh. Well, those will do. We are merely entertainment, so our thoughts should be like movies. I won't bother you much.

Whew, guess that's ok. For a minute there, this seems so much like… No…

It can't be! The voice in my head? Narrating text? Knowing I'm fictional?

I don't "seem" like Deadpool… I AM DEADPOOL!

"DANNY!"

Danny Fenton, yes, his human form, woke up with a start. "Yaaah! Killer chimichangas!" he yelped in a daze, rolling aside among the debris just in time to avoid an energy blast from the hovering Plasmius. Good news was that there really wasn't any voice in his head. Bad news was that his returning mortal enemy was no dream.

It was a blessing that Danny's rough landing happened to fall upon an old, abandoned apartment building. Otherwise, panicking citizens might've been an added concern to the situation. Although, it was a probable chance that there were at least a few homeless living in the lower floors… Danny climbed a nearby wall to his feet, looking for his girlfriend, the source of the shriek that awakened him. It was like he had beer-goggles on… A few loud, frantic guitar riffs told him that she was defending herself.

"Hey… Doctor Doom! Down here, you metal-masked asshole! Leave her alone and finish your job! C'mon, Doomie! It's freakin' clobberin' time, you jackass!" he yelled, tripping over his own two feet as he navigated along the wall around the now roofless apartment room. One would wonder if a concussion was beginning to set in. But head injury or not, his lover was his main concern.

"I thought we were done with this…" he muttered before he tried and failed to go ghost, causing his head to throb in pain. "Ugh… Lost my powers? I…We already… did this, right?" he slurred, falling back down to the floor.

"Damn Doctor Doom…"

"Behold, the power of vengeance and training! Daniel, defeated in one blow! What amazing power!" crowed Vlad as his hand passively swatted aside the energy fists of Ember's guitar chords like they were lazy flies. "What's this? Ember McLain, fighting for Daniel? My, how times have changed. No matter, you were no major threat to anyone anyway!"

He finished his statement by pointing one hand at Ember and firing a sizable ecto-beam at her. Ember barely had time to float aside to dodge it, the blast was that much faster than his regular ones were. Apparently, outer space had worked wonders on him…

"For one thing, you sucker-punched him. How the hell do you call that a fair victory, dumbass?" Ember asked, playing more guitar riffs to try and keep the known felon on the defensive.

Vlad yawned, his left hand practically on auto-pilot as it barely made any effort, successfully deflecting every attack. "Ever heard of the phrase 'by any means necessary'? That's the problem with the world's bleeding hearts, they don't have the nerve to take any opportunity that presents itself!"

"Umm… Yeah, says you and every other typical meta-jackoff." the ghoulish diva said in an unimpressed tone, unleashing an energy wave by means of working the hell out of her guitar's whammy bar while strumming a riff.

"Hey, I've spent the past couple of years trapped in space, I think you can cut me some slack!" growled Plasmius, having been pushed back a ways by Ember's loud sound waves.

"Heh… Based on what Danny's told me about you, this ain't the first time you jumped on a bandwagon, Vladdy!" Ember retorted, flying in close for an axe attack, hoping close-quarters combat would bring her better luck. Vlad clapped his hands together, blocking the guitar swing like a martial artist might catch a katana blade.

"Really? Name one other time!" the older halfa challenged, smashing his foot into her gut while he had a hold on her guitar, pushing her back a little and forcing her to double over in pain.

"Revenge on a man's whole family? Really? Like you're sooo original." Ember groaned, stubborn til the bitter end. "How about the whole 'evil clone' idea? I've seen that before." She ducked a punch. "The thing with Fright Knight? Yeah, you're not the first goon to think they can control a powerful entity." She flew up over a sweeping kick. "Legally become an authority figure? It's called Congress!" she said. Vlad paused.

Ember paused. They glared at each other.

Then they burst out laughing!

"Congress! Ha! I take it they still haven't gotten anything done?" Vlad said, barely containing his laughter enough to ask.

"I don't pay much attention… hehehe… but as far as I know, they haven't!" she snickered. Amazing how comedy can create moments and perhaps break some tension, especially if it's funny because it's true.

"Oh, will they ever learn?" Vlad mused, breaking the moment with a swift haymaker to Ember's face, sending her plummeting down, near the same abandoned apartment building Danny crash-landed into. "Rule One: Never let your guard down, little girl…" he sneered.

Danny had finally gotten to his feet again. His head feeling like its swimming in a large martini, he looked up just in time to see "Doom" send Ember falling down, somewhat in his direction. He panicked. Moving as fast as his body would let him, he dashed toward a window that just happened to face the direction of where Ember seemed to be falling. With a crash, he leaped through.

The best news was that his timing was straight out of a Saturday morning cartoon as he managed to catch the falling singer. The good news was that, while Vlad had gotten stronger, Ember seemed to be merely knocked for a loop. This woman was tough! The bad news… was that they were falling together. Why did his powers have to short-circuit worse than a malfunctioning Iron Man suit? Infuriating, isn't it?

'C'mon… Go ghost… Go! Any second now!' mentally screamed Danny as he strained and struggled to activate his ghost form as the trash-strewn ground of the alley came up to them at an alarming speed. Danny did the only concussion-inspired quick-thinking his hero complex would allow him to do: shift his body weight so that he was beneath Ember to hopefully help cushion her fall, held her close, and closed his eyes, savoring his last moment with her.

Then, Danny hit something… Something that seemed hard, but also seemed to bounce, sort of like the ground was…floating? He opened his eyes, his still-unsteady vision seeing nothing but his girlfriend's eyes, one of which was blacker than usual. That must've been where Vlad socked her…

"Hey, Dipstick… Guess I'm doing all the work today, huh?" she said in a pained tone, although Danny could still sense a hint of amusement, even in his current condition. Danny looked around. They seemed to be moving, despite the notable fact that they're still horizontal, Ember lying on top of Danny.

He tried sitting up, only for Ember to gently shove him back down. "Ah, ah. I wouldn't do that, Baby-Pop. You'd lose your balance."

"Huh?"

"Have you forgot? My guitar can act like a hoverboard. You're currently riding it like a hovering gurney." As they spoke, the hover-guitar was currently flying the duo along the sidewalks and streets of town at a brisk pace, a little faster than a running human and no more than two feet off the ground. It seemed better to lie low at the moment, considering…

"Whoa…" He did forget about that. Concussions during an emergency situation have a funny way of doing that… "Who needs the Silver Surfer when we have you?" he said, almost slurring his words. The adrenaline rush was over and the head injury was coming back, almost with a vengeance.

"Lamest pickup line ever… Also, you referenced! So unoriginal…" she scoffed, although her face showed she was more concerned about him than feeling mischievous. Even at times like these, she couldn't resist busting his chops about originality. It was beginning to seem a little too much like some sort of psycho-instinct thing… She merely hoped that she wouldn't run out of new ways to exploit his lack of inventiveness.

"Ugh… Where's Doom…?"

"Huh? Who?"

"Ya know… Doctor Doom, the guy who hit me like a freight train…"

"Man, he really messed up your head. That's Plasmius, remember?" She put a gentle hand on his forehead and began to carefully run it through his hair, looking for a bump or bruise or some other obvious hint of his head trauma as the guitar sped along, almost on a sort of auto-pilot as it navigated. She wondered if he forgot that she was already dead, having noticed the shifting around during the fall. Like that would've mattered, despite the fact that ghosts could still get hurt…

"I know, Em… It's a…It's an inside joke... Did I ever tell you why he's outta get meeee?" he said, beginning to slur again.

"Not really, Dipstick. You guys've always seemed glad to be rid of him and never bothered to tell the story. I can see why, though. The guy's a total dweeb! What was he, some trust-fund kid who went postal when his mom threw her outta the basement against his will?" she said, beginning to rant toward the end.

That got a chuckle out of Danny. "Certainly acts like it! Ugh…" a twinge of head pain. "Man, we gotta deal with him… Where'd he go…?"

"We left him back there. I doubt he's still there, though. Either he's hunting us down, decided to take off for the night—"

"Or he could be in our flight path!" called out Danny. Indeed, a grinning Plasmius was hovering, arms crossed, at the end of the street that the guitar was currently flying down.

"What's the matter? Got a hot date to get off to? Or were you just planning on getting off?" It didn't seem possible, but the disgusting grin on his face seemed to turn perverse after saying that.

"Oh, EW! Sex puns?! Really?" griped Ember, managing to stop the guitar, leaving the couple hovering a good ten feet away from the supervillain. Could this get any more disturbing?

"Oh, 'cum' now, dear. Don't be so 'easy'… to pick on. You just really seem the type to 'put out'…of your misery." He paused, looking lost in thought. "No, wait, I think that last one needs tweaking…"

"Ya…ya know what needs tweaking…?" slurred Danny, a drunken glare aimed right at Vlad. "Your face!" Then, he started laughing. He really needed some medical attention…

As Vlad scowled, Ember rolled her eyes up and looked at the nighttime sky, feeling defeated. Stars were out, a few puffy clouds hanging around. A peaceful view, ironically. 'What the hell kinda ending is this for us…? The great Phantom, addled by concussion, slain by revenge… Queen of Rock, Ember, wiped out of existence, guilty by association… Pfft, those would be nice tombstones…' she thought sarcastically.

"Doesn't matter, brat, because your fate's still the same. Total annihilation!" Vlad's voice cut into her brief mental monologue, her attention drawn to him powering up another supped-up ecto-beam. He seemed to take his time with it. The grin on his face was evident, he was blatantly savoring the moment. The sheer nerve of that egomaniac…

"Hey… Doctor Doom… Where's your maaaask?" Danny's drunken speech almost seemed comical, as if he wasn't paying attention.

"I am NOT Doctor Doom! However, I AM YOUR DOOM!" snarled the older halfa, firing the ecto-beam. It was a sizable beam with what should be enough power to reduce a human to ash, even if said human happens to be a powered-down halfa. Finally, it will be done and over with, this redundant feud…

…or so he thought.

A barely-visible bubble suddenly formed around the couple, just in time for it to deflect the powerful beam harmlessly skyward. Danny, had he been completely coherent, would've recognized it as a Portable Fenton Ghost Shield having been deployed.

"I thought we impeached you for good, Plasmius!" came a familiar feminine voice from above. Surfing on her hoverboard came Valerie the Red Huntress, blaster drawn and hovering mini-blasters armed. Once again, timing proved to be everything.

"I merely demanded a recount, my dear." sneered the vampire-like halfa, turning his attention to the newcomer, hands glowing with power. "This time, you'll find the ballot box to be more in my favor!" he added as he launched himself toward her. Valerie began firing as Vlad seemed to focus on getting in close to her. Punchy little creep, ain't he?

"You seem so sure, Masters. It wouldn't be a surprised to me if you misjudged the voter turnout" the Huntress remarked, sounding rather amused, despite the circumstance. Vlad frowned. Teenagers with their cocky attitude…

However, Vlad's flight suddenly took a detour as a sudden weight slammed onto his back and forced him back down toward the street. He met the concrete face-first, managing to put a few cracks in the asphalt. The villain felt movement, as if whatever landed on him was climbing off. He raised his head to get his bearings, only to hear a familiar giggle of satisfaction…

Looking around, he spotted a very-familiar mini-Phantom standing beside his fallen form, smirk on her face and fierce glare in her eyes. Holy karma payback, Batman…

"You…! Just what I need…" he growled, nonplussed, as he got to his hands and knees. He shook his head lightly to help clear it before moving to stand up. However, Danielle merely jumped up and landed feet-first on his head, smacking his head on the street again. Never has it felt so good to go Mario-style on an enemy!

"Better practice only rising when told, Vlad. 'Cause you're going to court for this!" proclaimed the epitome of Danny's feminine side.

Valerie flew down to Dani's side, weapons aimed at Vlad. "Either that, or exile to the Ghost Zone. Your call." the dark-skinned hero added, her tone icy-cold.

"You two… are just fresh meat. I've gotten stronger…" answered Vlad as he got to his hands and knees again, a little dazed from the blows to the head. At this time, Ember and Danny had floated over to them, still riding the hover-guitar. Vlad was flanked from two opposite sides now.

"So have we, moron. You lost the element of surprise. And now, we have you outnumbered." Ember said, her cocky smirk back on her face. Danny stirred.

"Yeah… Cause we're the Fantastic…" the loopy halfa stammered.

"Dipstick, don't say it…" Ember interrupted.

"The Fantastic…"

"Don't!"

"I say we're the Fan…"

"Fans! Yeah, real good, Baby-Pop. We're all fans of being superheroes, that's it. That's what you meant to say. Very nice of you. We appreciate it" Ember said rapidly, cutting him off for good. Last thing the little team needed was being hit with gimmick infringement! "Rest now while we barbecue this asshole…" she said soothingly before swinging her head in Vlad's direction, mentally throwing a wave of blue fire toward Vlad with her 'hair'. The odd-colored fireball smacked Vlad in the face before he could move, burning his head while making him tumble back to the ground, on his back.

Valerie fired her blasters while Dani shot a pair of ecto-beams, hoping to wear him down with constant fire. So far, it seemed to work. Ember quickly glimpsed down at Danny. He seemed to have lost consciousness for the time being. She sighed before jumping off the guitar. Vlad was going to pay. She slowly approached the revenge-driven villain who was busy defending himself from the constant barrage. His back was turned. Good, for now. She wasn't sure what she was going to do. Her guitar was still carrying the KO'd Danny.

Improvise. That's what she'd have to do. She was getting closer, her mind trying to come up with a plan, some form of attack. As she came within two feet of the now-standing foe, she could only come up with one idea…

She pounced, her legs wrapping around his midsection while using her notably-sharp fingernails to frantically claw his face like a feral cat. Vlad, like most people that suddenly have a feral cat attacking their heads, screamed and panicked and stumbled around, trying to get the "cat" off of his head.

"What the hell?! Get it off! Get it off! Oww! Dammit, OWW!" were some of Plasmius' frantic screams as he shambled around, shaking himself, trying to swat at Ember. The rock diva just kept clawing at his face, eventually causing him to bleed. Vlad stumbled back into a building wall, back-first, hoping to jar Ember off. No such luck. He tried again and again.

Ember glanced Dani and Valerie watching the random phenomena, looks of amused awe on their faces. "As much as this seems like a once-in-a-lifetime moment, I can't hold him forever! Got a Thermos?!" she asked, managing to jam a thumb in Vlad's eye, causing him to scream louder and get more frantic. He fell down and tried to roll over to shake her off.

Dani shook her head, but Valerie began feeling around her back, knowing she had one on her. Taking it out from its holding place, he uncapped it and aimed it toward Vlad. "Move, girl! Otherwise, I'll end up getting you too!" she warned, ready to go.

"One second!" was the ghost's answer as she untangled her legs from the writhing Vlad. The villain frantically tried to grab her, meaning to perform some counterattack. Ember scrambled away from the bloody-faced halfa as the Huntress activated the Thermos, capturing Vlad in a matter of moments.

Ember panted, her adrenaline wearing down. "If that jerk didn't need a mask before, I bet he does now…" she muttered, getting to her feet.

"You alright, McLain?" asked the Huntress. It had taken quite the effort on Danny's part to convince her that the diva was going legitimate, especially since Ember tended to still cause light mischief now and again. But at some point, Valerie began to at least trust that Ember would be a trustworthy ally in protecting the town from major threats.

"I will be as soon as I wash my hands… Eww, pervy old man blood…" Ember shook her hands as if they were soaked, little flecks of ectoplasmic blood scattering to the street below. Dani floated toward her.

"Is Danny going to be ok?" the little clone asked, concerned for her 'cousin' as she gazed toward the fallen boy. Clearly, he was still unconscious. Ember hoped he was 'sleeping it off'. "I hope so, Dani…" muttered the singer.

"Should we take him to a hospital?" asked the Huntress, knowing the possibility of the Fenton parents going into a panic from finding out that their son was put in the hospital by a supervillain. She remembered the time the Fentons burst into Casper High, armed to the teeth… They scared more people than the ghosts-in-question did!

"Nah. I'll deal with him. He mentioned to me a few times that he built himself a little stash of medical stuff. Between me and his sister, I think we can patch him up, no problem. He'll be sore for a few days, but I doubt he'll be joining my ranks yet." Ember said, turning away from them. The trio went over to where Danny lay, guitar obediently hovering in place.

"Should we have known that something like this would happen?" Dani asked, looking at her beaten original.

"Perhaps. It wasn't as if he died after the asteroid incident. I suppose halfas can breath in space, as long as they're in ghost mode… He was definitely the vengeful type of guy…" mused Valerie, glancing at the occupied Thermos like a scientist observing a specimen.

"Just like comic books. 'Oooh, the mortal enemy returns'… I guess there is truth in fiction." Ember took to giving Danny a good observation, assessing the total damage. It was fortunate that it was mostly bruises and cuts, aside from the obvious bump on the head.

There came an awkward silence. The four of them never really just "hung out" as a group, with Ember having defected from villainy just several months ago, Dani's constant journeying across the country, and Valerie normally flying solo. Perhaps sometime. After all, there's a first time for everything…

"So… What do we do with him?" asked the Huntress, raising the Thermos. Ember said nothing, continuing her observation of her lover. Dani looked thoughtful, however.

"Well, we can't just put him in the Ghost Zone. He'll just find a way out and the fight continues another day." reasoned the clone. "No need for us to have our own personal Joker…"

The Red Huntress frowned in her helmet. Dani was right. Why have a supervillain put in a situation where he'll just break out again and again and again, laughing at the hero's expense? He did come back from seemingly everything, even outer space. Something had to be done. But what? They weren't murderers or anything.

Her musings were cut short when Ember bluntly took the Thermos away, glaring at it. "I got an idea of what to do with this. You two just chill, alright?"

"Ember, I don't…"

"No, Huntress. I got this. Trust me. He won't be back, at least not for a long time. I know you goody-goodies don't like the whole 'cruel and unusual punishment' thing. Good thing for you all that I'm not ALL good. Just keep telling yourself that this clown had it coming and don't think about what I have planned." Ember explained with an eerie calmness which would've concerned Huntress and Dani had it not been for the obvious fact that Vlad had indeed crossed the rock star and, before his space exile, crossed everybody anyway.

"Alright. I'll take your word for it, Ember." Valerie replied, nodding her head as if confirming it to herself. Ember nodded back, attaching the thermos to her belt. She then carefully climbed onto her guitar (and Danny) and slowly began to hover away, in the general direction of Fenton Works.

"Catch you guys later. Perhaps we can all team up sometime when the town's in danger. We'd totally rock evil's world!" she said with her usual confident smirk before speeding up and away.

Dani and Valerie were left standing there, all alone in the street. "Well, there's a thought… A team." said Dani, trying to fill the odd silence with some conversation.

"Yeah, as if our lives aren't strange enough." chuckled the Huntress. She began to wonder if she'd really miss the days when this gig seemed simpler… After all, most things aren't so cut-and-dry. There are always the 'shades of grey'...

Danny slowly began to come back into the realm of the living. He hoped the soft surface he felt himself lying on wasn't a soft fluffy cloud of heaven, like that old stereotype. What had happened anyway? He managed to open his eyes to find a familiar ceiling. He was in his room, on his bed! He would've smiled for joy, if it weren't for the headache suddenly coming on right at that moment.

"Arrgh… Man, what happened…" he weakly asked himself, not knowing if anyone was around. Fortunately for him, someone was as a familiar shade of blue and pale-white invaded his vision.

"Heeey, Baby-Pop. How are you feeling?" asked the worried diva, leaning down to plant a gentle kiss on his lips. The weak boy was grateful that Ember was holding herself back. He wasn't sure if he could withstand her usual rambunctious ways of showing affection.

"Headache and a stiff body, although I'm suddenly feel a bit better, thanks" he said, smiling through the pain.

"Flatterer. I don't have healing powers. Anyways, Vlad's been… taken care of. The 'Iron Maiden' and the little duplicate came to our rescue." It took Danny a little while for him to figure out who she meant by those descriptors. "Between the three of us, we got lucky… I think I rocked out loudest, though." Ember grinned. Leave it to Ember to brag.

"Where is he now?"

"Oh, you don't have to worry about that. We Thermos'd him."

"And?"

"Trust me, I took care of it." A smug look appeared on her face. Danny felt like he should almost pity Vlad. Almost… He knew that look. It was the same look she got when she got the upper hand in her villain days. The same look she got after proving a valid point during the few times they argued. The same look she got the first night they decided to take things to the next level and he found out the hard way that she preferred to be in control…

Did Batman ever have a situation where Catwoman dealt with a specific Arkham villain and he was left wondering what she did with him? Probably.

"Ehehe… Uhh… Thanks, I guess?" Danny wasn't sure what to say to that, although he did truly feel grateful toward her for apparently taking care of him after Vlad knocked him out. Guarding a targeted unconscious person wasn't exactly easy work, especially against a really strong enemy.

"No prob, Baby-Pop. So… Care to explain to me why you called Vlad 'Doctor Doom'?" she asked, curious, as she sat down on the bed and slowly placed herself next to him to cuddle, careful not to accidentally hit a sore spot. Bruises were peppered throughout his body. He'd probably have problems walking and moving around for a while…

"Huh? I called him that?" The confused look on his face was priceless to her. She adored it. She'd have to stump him more often.

"Yeah, remember?" she pressed. She figured he probably wouldn't remember a lot of his addled behavior.

"I guess I can see that. How Vlad became like he is… well… It's the same thing as Doctor Doom's origin." He explained.

"Gonna have to explain, dipstick. Fantastic Four wasn't exactly one of the superhero gigs I kept up with. I at least know that Doom keeps targeting those heroes specifically." Ember shrugged. At least talking should help get his mind off the pain, so she reasoned.

And so, for a while, they discussed superhero stuff. It was nice to have a normal enough discussion for a change.

Meanwhile…

Ember's realm consisted of a small messy apartment, filled with music equipment and memorabilia, both of her own career and of famous rock bands. And by 'filled', it should be noted that it should mean 'practically overflowing'. Like a normal rebellious 18-year-old, Ember's realm was quite messy, some spots more so than others.

Case in point, her closet. It was placed in a spot in her bedroom that could be described as 'out of the way', in a spot that nobody would look twice at unless they were deliberately looking for said closet. And out of the way it truly was, for Ember rarely needed to go in there for much.

Despite that, the inside was a veritable mountain of various random items. Musical trinkets, knick-knacks from various Ghost Zone spots, old no-longer-cared-for clothes (including lingerie), some trash, empty makeup/facepaint containers, etc. It did look like it was accessed recently, with the giant pile looking more disheveled than usual. But the pile would eventually settle with time. And a lot of time there would be for that…

Deep, deep within the smelly, old, unclean mass of detritus, down toward the bottom, there sat a Fenton Thermos, hidden away and already forgotten about… If one listened extremely carefully in Ember's bedroom (only if there was complete and total silence), one can almost hear something, almost like a whisper….

"Let me out! You hear me!? Why aren't I being let out!? You guys usually let ghosts back into the Ghost Zone! What's taking so long? I demand to talk about my release! You can't keep me in here forever!"

Vlad panted, having exhausted his voice from constant yelling. What the hell took so long? Did they take long putting ghosts back in the Zone? He wasn't sure.

And so he waited… and waited…

And waited…

"How long's it been? 10 hours?" he asked. He didn't even have a watch. At this point, it could've been two days. Maybe four.

Waiting's a bitch, isn't it?

"Huh? Who said that?"

Oh nobody. Just the voice in your head. Loneliness will do that to some people…

"Am I… insane?"

If you have to ask at this point, you're crazier than I thought. Who's up for a movie?

"Umm… We don't even have a TV in here?" he growled like the impatient idiot that he is. "I am not an idiot!" You're acting like one now. "No, I'm not!" You're talking to a narrating voice in your head. That doesn't exactly scream 'genius', now does it? "Insanity and stupidity are two different things!" Ah, so he admits he's crazy! "DAMN YOU!" Just giving you some companionship, pal. Friends joke with each other. "Who says we're friends?!" Calm down, Skippy. We got a long wait ahead of us.

A looooong wait… When's Spring Cleaning?

"What does that have to do with anything?!"

Nothing! Said too much for the fourth wall…

Author's Note: And there it is, a fic pulled out of nothing but a tiny little observation. I really hope it's not too strange or unusual, considering how the first two chapters were.

About the one observation, seriously, anybody else notice that Vlad's origin/motive is practically the same as Doctor Doom from the Fantastic Four? Two college buddies? Accident during a science experiment? Victimized friend blames the other friend and declares revenge? Becomes rich and powerful and uses that to attack? I'm not too sure if Vlad's backstory is supposed to be a legit parody of Doom or if they did that on accident, but I'm still surprised that it's not pointed out. (Unless some of us fanfic writers already did point it out and I just haven't read those yet, of course.)

As always, feel free to review and tell me if I did a good job or if I should leave the 'strange comedy' to other better writers. Thank you.

Shameless plug, but if anybody's interested, check out my Teen Titans fics and my sole Beetlejuice fic. I could use some more inspiration to crack this writer's block I seem to have, especially with the Beetlejuice story… Reviews are important! Or, at least thoughtful… Lol.

Until next time!


	4. The Future Begins Now

Author's Note: Wow. 4 chapters. Amazing for somebody who's inspirations are currently running low on fuel… I think I'm pulling something out of my you-know-what on this one, so if you think this one isn't exactly my best work, I hope you'll forgive me for trying to come up with something on the fly. I hope this works.

Speaking of ideas, I had a couple of them for this little series but I'm not sure which one I should use. Therefore, since I'm actually getting reviews and story followers, I will put up a poll for you, The People, to decide which direction I should go after this one. Please vote!

Disclaimer: Do I seem like I own any intellectual properties? I can't even keep the creative juices flowing all the time. Lol.

Part 4: The Future Begins Now

If Danny Fenton learned one thing from such comic book sagas as Marvel's "Civil War", it's that publicly revealing your secret identity will leave you open for certain things to happen. Almost like mixing business with pleasure, only without the pleasure… No, perhaps it's like mixing your home life with your work responsibilities. At least for the average joe, the work responsibilities don't try to murder him and/or take over the city/world on a daily basis…

It started with a simple, brief email he had gotten one Friday afternoon after school.

"Phantom,

Your time is soon, as the vultures will soon feast on your remains. You will be deleted like last week's spam! Heed my warning well! -S.T. #FaceDeletion"

Danny didn't know who "S.T." was but he couldn't help but roll his eyes. Negative emails weren't new to the halfa since the Disasteroid incident, namely ones from Mr. and Mrs. Manson telling him to, quote, "go exorcize yourself". The young Fenton didn't need to be a rocket scientist to tell what expletive word they really wanted to use there… Danny and Sam's time as a couple only lasted a couple of months before they decided they were better off as best friends, due to a combination of attacking Manson parents and interfering ghosts.

Or was it "interfering Manson parents and attacking ghosts"? It was pretty much the same difference, much to Danny and Sam's chagrin… But that was then. Their friendship is strong as ever and Danny has Ember now, despite the "Batman/Catwoman" nature of their relationship. Things worked out.

Back to the matter at hand, Danny wondered if he should ask Tucker to find the source of this email. Despite the public knowledge of his superhero identity, Danny's personal email was only known to family, friends, Ember, and a few schoolmates. Some crackpot asshole getting his email address was concerning. Perhaps a fame-seeker trying to claim that he 'hacked the legendary halfa's email'? Maybe a two-bit vigilante trying to make a name for himself? Or maybe an enemy trying to issue a challenge?

He gave Tucker a call…

Later…

"Odd, dude. This guy covered his tracks. Anonymous email address, untraceable with a bunch of decoy trails. Strange thing about that is the decoy trails lead to old-time companies like Atari and IBM… Wonder if that's a gimmick or something. Either way, this isn't some common jackass. He's got tech, man." The African-American, tech-obsessed Mayor of Amity assessed, after looking at the report on his laptop, which was hooked up to multiple high-tech portable devices that the Government probably used to track people.

Some things never change. Tucker's knack for tech-smarts certainly didn't. "So I guess I should keep looking over my shoulder now, huh?" asked Danny calmly. Being a superhero, the idea of being hunted down didn't faze him anymore. The only thing that bothered him was the fact that he didn't know who the hunter was this time.

"Looks like it. Might wanna let ol' Blue know. It's good to have an extra pair of eyes, man." Tucker said, passively starting to disassemble his high-tech setup. Danny couldn't help but chuckle. "What's so funny?"

"It's just funny how things change. I still remember how surprised you were when I told you about our relationship last month. And now, she's just a regular here on Team Phantom to ya. Hell, you call her by nickname." Danny mused, a smirk on his face. The sight of a wide-eyed, jaw-dropped Tucker when Ember had appeared and kissed Danny on his cheek would be one of those priceless hilarious moments.

Tucker grinned back. "Good point, Danny. I guess she earned our trust. Hmm… Are you ever going to tell your parents about her? I mean, it shouldn't be too difficult, since they know about your powers."

"Eventually. I know I should. But I'm… I'm just nervous, ya know…? They accept me, but what if they don't like it because she's a full ghost? Not to mention, well… You know how she is." Danny trailed off.

"Yeah. A regular loose cannon. Hey, least she cares about you, right? If it's important to you, she might behave. Well…behave as much as a wild rock diva can behave, anyway." Tucker said as he packed up his tech into designated cases.

"She'd probably want to do the same thing she did to you: pop in at the right time. She did say she loves surprising people sometimes. Probably part of her wild side…" Danny said, an amused look on his face as he mentioned Ember's personality. Tucker noticed.

"Eh, you love it." Tucker said, briefly showing a taunting smirk. "I bet she's wild in other ways as well."

Danny raised an eyebrow. "Tuck, you want me to start talking about Valerie? You remember that I briefly dated her too." he warned, crossing his arms.

Tucker raised his hands. "Alright, I give. Jeez, sensitive much?" he said, somewhat amused.

"Eh, I dunno." Danny shrugged, standing up and began stretching, as if preparing for something physical. "All I know is that I should probably start my patrol. Thanks for checking out this email, man."

"No prob, Danny. Guess I should head back to the office myself." Tucker said, backpack set to go. "Running a town is tough work sometimes."

"So is protecting it." replied the halfa, raising his hand for a high-five, which Tucker obliged.

"Give me a shout if you run into serious trouble. You know I always got some heat on me" the mayor said, indicating his backpack. Most likely he had a small-yet-powerful Fenton weapon of some kind hidden away.

"What are friends for, right? Later, Tuck" Danny said with a grin before flying through the wall and into the open air.

The evening came on and so far, Danny hadn't found a single crime or ghostly disturbance. A pleasant surprise so far. But he had to maintain vigilance, for who knows what kind of opportunity evil might take. And so, he decided at least one more pass through the town, just to be sure.

A sudden noise of light static interrupted him, somebody was communicating via the Fenton Phones. "Rock Star 1 to Clueless 1, do you read?"

"Sigh… Can't I get a better call sign by now?"

"Nope, Baby-Pop." Ember giggled. "It still suits you well." Danny began regretting giving her an earpiece…until he remembered her other method of calling him when she needed assistance: loudly playing an electric guitar rendition of the Ghostbusters theme until he showed up. By the time he got there, the trio of armed bank robbers and any nearby citizens begged Danny to shut her up. It certainly wasn't a good day to get any positive feedback on Ember's performance as a reformed ex-villainess.

"Argh… What's the problem, Ember?" he grumbled, knowing that he'll never live the whole 'clueless' thing down.

"You might want to fly on over here to Amity Museum of Somewhat-Priceless Not-So-Rare Artifacts Of Some Sort. I'm in the middle of a four-sided fight between myself, some thugs, Penelope Spectra, and the city's SWAT team. By the way, your nerdy mayor friend better rename this place. Seriously…" she explained. Oddly enough, she was completely calm about it. Danny had a hunch about that.

"Well, we're not exactly a big-time city like Chicago, so…Yeah, we get the not-so-important stuff to display. Anyways, you make it sound like a walk in the park. What's the status?" he asked, already changing his direction to fly toward the museum.

"Well, it's kind of a Mexican standoff right now. The thugs have plenty of ammo and got a huge wild west display for cover. The SWAT naturally has plenty of ammo too. Couple of columns for cover. Spectra's hovering around the area, trying to zap whoever sticks their head out. I think one copper has an anti-ghost weapon. He keeps taking a potshot at Spectra every so often. I'm sticking to the ceiling in the rafters. The others drew Spectra's attention away from me, but I know it's going to be a real shitstorm soon. I'd try something, but…" she trailed off.

"You think somebody might hurt the cops by accident? I get it. On my way. Do I even want to know how you got into that situation?" he asked. There was a pause.

"Uh, I don't think it'd be that interesting a story…" Ember could not sound more innocent if she tried. Did Danny really need to know that she was curious if there were any valuable music-related items she could pilfer? Not really. It's not like they were married. Her business was her business. Besides, as long as she's not hurting anybody, right?

"Never mind… I'll take on Spectra. When I get her attention, help deal with the gunmen." He ordered before going silent. Time to go to work.

"Copy that, Clueless 1" answered Ember, just as serious. Danny sighed… At least Ember was showing restraint in battle, knowing how sound-based powers can be when dealing with multiple threats.

The battle went easily enough. Danny had phased through the roof invisibly and surprised Spectra by tackling her from behind. The ensuing fistfight was enough of a cue for the "banditos" hiding in the wild west display to open fire on the hiding SWAT members. As the bullets flew, Ember floated down behind the thieves and surprised them by smashing the closest one's head with her guitar, rendering him unconscious. The ambush drew enough attention away from the authorities for them to start firing back.

A couple of the bandits got clipped by a bullet or two. Fortunately for them, it was merely suppressing fire. A third got knocked aside from a stray ecto-beam from Danny when Spectra dodged an attack. The last two remaining were flanked by Ember, who was lightly strumming her guitar in some random western-sounding melody, and the approaching cops.

"Freeze! We got you surrounded!" one cop called, typically. Couldn't they come up with other things to bellow to criminals? The crooks looked at each other, then looked behind them.

"Wanna try your luck, 'pardners'? It's the showdown at the ol' corral and you seem to be a few cowpokes short of a posse. I recon you're quite lucky, really." Ember mused, her strumming seemed to pick up, the country-western melody seemed to become more upbeat as if building up to something. "Yonder hero has taken care of one of your problems. So it could've been much worse for you. Spectra ain't exactly a merciful outlaw of these lands, that's for sure."

The criminals became nervous, wondering what the monologue-spewing songstress was up to. Was she trying to calm them down? Lulling them into a false sense of security? The music was certainly charming, despite the groans of the wounded, and it did fit the setting of their chosen makeshift battlefront. But no, she was Ember McLain, undead upstart vigilante! They had heard about her.

If you get in her way, you head will get rocked, so they say. It was also said that if you cross her, beware the wrath of her mate, the infamous superhero Danny Phantom. They knew this well from the local underground criminal community. They should run. Or at least turn themselves in to the cops.

Somehow, they didn't feel like it. Something about the music, the swinging tempo and the country vibe… It sounded peaceful. Fun, even. They couldn't understand it, but they suddenly had the urge to…

Square dance. And so they did. Even the SWAT team joined in, seemingly caught up in a moment of spontaneity, cutting loose from all the serious drama from moments ago. After all, everybody needs to cut loose once in a while.

Or so they were thinking. Danny knew better as he passively observed the scene while wrestling with an angry Spectra. Ember's music powers at work, almost like a subtle suggestion during hypnosis. It was harmless, really, when it was something like this. Not like the blatant mind-control of her old days as a villain. A rake of sharp fingernails across his face drew his attention back to the vile psychiatrist in front of him.

"My eyes are up here, Phantom. Stop looking elsewhere." the devil-horn-haired redhead sneered, swinging her other hand around to claw his face again. He intercepted the claw by grabbing her wrist.

"Sorry, Spectra, but I was looking at someone far more interesting." Danny shot back, turning himself around and pulling her wrist so that he flipped her over him and onto her back. Spectra growled, infuriated at the counterattack. She kicked up, hoping for her foot to catch Danny's head while he was still relatively in range. No such luck. He leaned back, grabbing his Thermos at the same time. He uncapped it as he leaned back forward and then aimed it at her.

He glared at her, giving her a chance to surrender peacefully before he activated it. "You'll pay for this…" she spat out. Oh my, where, oh where has he heard that one before?

"Sorry, looks like our session's over. Same time next week?" Danny asked in a fake-caring voice as he sucked Spectra up into the Fenton Thermos. Another victorious battle. He sighed in relief as he took in the sounds of electric guitar and people dancing. He turned to float over to his girlfriend and wrap things up.

"Hey, cowgirl! All set here! How's the dance-off?" he asked, hovering across the spacious room.

"Ah do declare the cops are winning. These rascals are looking pretty worn already, sugah." Ember answered, adding a Southern drawl to her voice. Danny made a mental note to have her use the Southern accent more often. Everybody has their kinks, right?

"Well, that's all good then. Time to wrap—" BOOM!

Danny was sent flying across the room by an explosive making contact with his back. Ember shrieked, ceasing her guitar-playing. The cops (and even the criminals, out of curiosity and the need to survive) aimed their weapons at the direction where the explosive might have come from, opposite of where Danny was sent.

"Who the hell's there?!" Ember yelled, setting the power knob on her guitar from "stun" to "kill". Nobody blows up her man. Nobody but her, anyway. But that was a more private matter…

A voice answered, sounding both high and low at the same time. A fusion of two voices, perhaps… "Oh nobody, really. Just a new twist on a couple of old favorites, my dear…"

Danny, his back bruised and burned, managed to get back to his feet and looked toward where the voice(s) came from. He saw someone vaguely familiar and definitely not in a good way. He hadn't seen something like that since…the dark future?

It was Skulker and yet, it wasn't. His fiery hair was now white instead of green, his armor seemed even more technological than usual, his eye sockets now looked like they were wearing shades, and he had a grey cape over his shoulders and back. "We are SkulkTech 1.1 and we will delete all but your pelts!"

It suddenly made sense, that email… "S.T." was SkulkTech, the fusion of Skulker and Technus. But Danny had eliminated Dark Danny from the timeline. So… why fuse anyway? And why 1.1? Wasn't it 9.9?

"Skulk…Tech?" Ember asked, raising an eyebrow at what seemed to be her former boyfriend. The being did also look a little like that technology creep, Nicholai Technus, but that didn't make much sense to her.

"Yes, our dear. We have grown tired of losing again and again and AGAIN to that inferior whelp! Therefore, we have agreed to merge our powers into one vastly superior being! We are SkulkTech and we are the future!" rumbled the hulking machine, raising his arms in a fighting gesture, seemingly arming himself for combat.

"Not this again…" muttered Danny as he floated over to Ember. He couldn't believe it. SkulkTech was here, in the present, currently existing. Perhaps some things of that dark alternate timeline were meant to happen anyway. Either way, this would be an uphill climb for the duo, considering Danny had just fought Spectra.

Danny glanced at the few humans that were still around. "Guys, I'd advise getting out of here and taking care of the whole arresting thing outside. This guy's not going to spare anybody if he gets a hold of you."

The cops and criminals agreed and panicked, hauling up their fallen and wounded and heading for the exit as quickly as possible. Skulker aimed an arm cannon toward the exit. "What if we wanted a captive audience?!" he asked as he fired toward the wall above the exit doors, hoping to cut them off or bury them in rubble. Danny quickly sped over and intercepted the energy blast, taking another hit in the process. SkulkTech guffawed in amusement.

"You heroes crack us up! Sacrificing your bodies for these mortal worms! They're all going to be food for our pets anyway!" he proclaimed as the humans scurried their way out the door. Danny started the painful process of getting back to his feet, noticing Ember hitting a riff on her guitar sending an energy fist toward SkulkTech. Unfortunately, the pink energy just washed across the mecha, having no effect whatsoever.

Shit… Danny's only real chance was the Ghostly Wail, if SkulkTech 1.1 was anything like the assumedly-more-improved SkulkTech 9.9. However, when he intercepted the blast meant to trap the humans inside, he took it pretty hard to the chest, which left him short on breath since it now hurt to breathe in a lot of air. Of all the rotten luck. Why did those two idiots have to fuse together like the two ghosts that they…

Wait… Two ghosts…? Hmm…

"Ember!" He called as loudly as he could manage, stumbling over in her direction. The songstress floated back, dodging a giant fist from the fused ghost. "What, Baby-Pop. Kinda busy here!" she said, leaping over another fist.

"I got an idea… Come here." he said, throwing an ecto-beam or two at SkulkTech to distract him from Ember. She floated over until she stood next to him. They both fired away, hoping to at least drain the bot's power somewhat.

"How do ghosts fuse?"

"What? Jeez, is this the right time to be asking 'how-to' questions, dipstick?"

"I'm just thinking of the sense that two can play this game… or is it four? I dunno! You know what I mean." he stammered, feeling frustrated. Ember blushed. Fusion? With him? Sure, Skulker and Technus fused and it was probably a business decision. So its not like love between two ghosts was required to fuse. But she couldn't help but think of that kind of sentiment.

Could one really blame her? Not really. She knew of fusion but thought of it as a bunch of nonsense only used by clingy weaklings that needed others to even survive. She was the Queen of Rock music. She didn't need anyone's power to survive but her own. But suddenly, here's Danny in the middle of a crisis just putting the idea out there… And sure, it was a pretty big crisis, the opponent being as strong as he is… But the idea just seemed… right somehow.

She then realized that she must never tell Danny of these thoughts! He'd finally get to bust on HER for being cliché and unoriginal! Love him or not, she'd never want him to have that chance. That's supposed to be her gimmick on him! So, she just spoke…

"Well, not a lot to it if you can focus. We concentrate our powers, focus on each other, bring our bodies together, and…Wham, we're one."

"Really?" Danny smirked, blushing. Of all the times to use entendres… Luckily for the duo, a couple of random ecto-beams hit SkulkTech in his shades-covered eyes, blinding him for a moment or two. They couldn't afford to get sloppy now.

"Baby-Pop, I'm serious. If you wanna do this… well… then fine! Better hope this ain't permanent, though. Some fusions end up sticking…" she warned, working the hell out of her guitar.

Danny knew this was insanely short-notice. But it couldn't be helped. If they ran, SkulkTech might rampage through a good chunk of Amity by the time his lungs were allowed to support a Ghostly Wail. If they fought like they're doing now, surely they would either run out of power or get slaughtered, whichever came first.

Besides, it would be fun to see what a singer's voice could do with the Ghostly Wail ability!

"Let's do it, Ember!" he said, causing her to blush again. Damn double-puns!

"Blind him again! We'll need a little time!" she replied, now trying to send as many energy blasts to the head as possible. Danny complied and fired some more ecto-beams at his head. The combination of so much blinding light from the energy worked to cause SkulkTech to completely stop his advance and swipe his hands over his eye sockets like he wasn't wearing cybernetic shades. Apparently, the "shades" were his eyes after all… And yet the light still blinded him for a few moments. Perhaps that explained one reason for the future improvements…

Ember began to channel her energy, her flaming ponytail flickering wildly, growing. A light-blue aura formed around her body. Danny tried channeling his power. He guessed that it was like powering up an ecto-beam, but letting the power flow through his body instead of just his hand. Sure enough, a green aura could be seen emanating around his body. It took ten seconds. SkulkTech was still fumbling with his eye-shades, grumbling about prey that took cheap shots. Served him right…

He looked at his girlfriend and caught her staring at him. The smile on her face told him that she was in 'Step 2', focusing on him. He couldn't help but smile back, she was probably thinking of happy moments. Or perhaps just the moments where she'd make fun of him… Yeah, most likely the latter… He sometimes couldn't believe how much she…

His thoughts were interrupted by a hug from Ember. 'Step 3: Contact'. It was followed immediately by feeling a burst of power, Ember's power. But instead of the old days where that power was punching the hell out of him, that power was spreading inside of him. He could feel 'her' from his arms to his feet to his head. It sort of felt like his soul was being tackled out of its boots, yet it felt so welcoming.

He embraced it. He embraced her.

Some might think that this display of power would be one of those action scenes where the whole area would be bathed in blinding light while the stunned opponent dropped his jaw and said something to the effect of "What the hell is this?!". But no, this was much more low-key than that. All there seemed to be was two bodies slowly molding into one being behind a blue-green aura. No flashy displays, which was abnormal for one of the two personalities involved…

Danny awoke. The first thing he noticed was that he was standing. The second thing was SkulkTech finally shaking off the blindness only to look at him and drop his jaw. Danny raised an eyebrow. The third thing he noticed was that he felt…different. Sort of…feminine. Then it all hit him. He and Ember were one and the same! He still felt male. He looked down. Sure enough, a flat male chest. But he knew he felt like a woman too. He reached back and drew Ember's guitar from his back. He instinctively placed his fingers on a chord and struck a few riffs, expertly riffing the intro to Black Sabbath's "Iron Man". He understood the guitar, like he'd always known it for years! 'Enough, Baby-Pop! We got work to do, remember?' his mind told him.

But that wasn't his mind. That was Ember! It was strange. Enjoyable because it was Ember, but strange nonetheless. Was this how Peter Parker felt like when he wore the symbiote known as Venom? Couldn't be… Ember doesn't have the brutally-savage, animalistic tendencies… Not to mention, also unlike the infamous symbiote, he didn't feel like he had a large, demonic mouth…

Ember suddenly made his body weave out of the way of a pair of rockets that SkulkTech had launched at the halfa. The rockets blew up a display of Revolutionary War knock-off props. It seems the mecha's shock wore off faster than Danny's. 'Parker! Get your ass in gear or I swear I WILL bite you like Venom does!' his now-female brain scolded. Danny gulped, leaping over a couple of laser blasts before firing off a hard guitar riff, which shot a blue-green fireball at SkulkTech.

The fireball seemed to do some damage as it hit his right arm, burning some of his circuits. The techno-hunter growled, raising his other arm and firing his arm cannon. "Dan-ber" ducked the blast and then stuck his/her tongue out at him. "Firing at me before I even gave my performance? How rude." he/she said, the voice coming out as both male and female at the same time. He/she cartwheeled away from several more wild shots from the increasingly-frustrated enemy.

The fused hero then stopped and gave a light cough, as if preparing. SkulkTech's chest cavity opened, revealing a compact missile. But before he could even fire it, "Dan-ber" let loose with a loud, shrill wail of a rock-star shout. The sheer force of the Ghostly Diva Wail sent everything within "Dan-ber"s field of vision that wasn't nailed down flying back until it all hit the wall. Hell, the wall was even pushed back, indented by the Wail's power!

SkulkTech's circuits were overloading. It almost felt like being overwhelmed by the power of newer technology, which infuriated the Technus half of the mecha. The sheer power… It was raw, forceful, like…a power ballad. Technus couldn't believe he made a music reference. Skulker couldn't believe he had to agree with Technus. Their systems were critical... Did their arm just fly off into the distance? Couldn't have been… Error…Error…Error…

And so, in pieces, SkulkTech was thrown backward and scattered among the ground, fell by the combination of a talent for singing and a particular yelling ability. "Dan-ber" surveyed the damage. "Holy crap" the duality of voices said. 'Who the hell's gonna pay for this?' Danny's newfound femininity asked. 'I dunno. Mayor Tucker?' his masculine side answered. 'You know he's not going to like this…' warned the female brain. Who knew Ember didn't want to just dump problems on somebody else? Maybe Danny was a good influence on her. 'Don't push your luck, Baby-Pop. I just don't want you to die just yet. The guy does have a lot on his plate, running this town and all.' the brain snapped. Good point. Even so… He knew what he had to do. Get to Tucker and explain things before he hears about it from the cops!

But first, he/she aimed his/her Fenton Thermos at the remains of SkulkTech and collected them.

"Who the hell are you?!" was Tucker's immediate reaction upon seeing Danny phase into the Mayoral Office. Didn't he recognize him? "What's wrong, Tucker? It's us!" the fused voices said. Tucker looked confused. "Danny? What the…? Have you seen yourself?" asked the world's youngest mayor, indicating a tall mirror nearby.

Danny moved his body over to look and realized why his friend freaked out. He was still fused with Ember and completely forgot about the idea of splitting back apart! It felt so…natural. Was that what love does? 'We can discuss relationships later. Look at us.' suggested Ember. Apparently, she was kinda enjoying the idea of being Danny's brain. Or did she feel like she was the body and Danny was the brain?

The couple looked upon itself in the mirror. Their body looked like Danny Fenton (not Phantom), with semi-long black hair featuring streaks of light-blue, a black leather jacket with Danny's Phantom insignia embossed on the back, black jean-shorts, and combat boots. His body, while all male, seemed a little more lean than usual, probably from Ember's female influence. His face contained her green eyes, her usual eye makeup pattern, and her nose, while the rest was Danny. She wasn't kidding about fusion.

"Damn. We look good!" said 'Dan-ber' appraisingly. Tucker stammered again. "Dude! What the hell happened?!"

"Oh. Yeah. That. We have some bad news, Tuck…"

A few minutes later, Tucker was on the floor laughing. Dan-ber was confused. "Aren't you mad about the property damage?" he/she asked. Since when was major property damage funny?

"I should be. But holy crap, man! When a singer brings the house down, you really bring the house down!" he said, still laughing. He rolled to his hands and knees, trying to calm himself. "Besides… That place didn't have anything major in it anyway. Any relics in it were just fake replicas anyway since we are just a small town. Also, the council was thinking of taking it down anyway, since many people consider it an eyesore with a stupid name. If anything, you just made the demolition job a little easier!"

Dan-ber just stared, his/her eyes wide open. This had to reek of "comic book coincidence". A battle that leaves massive damage just happened to be in a building that would've been taken down anyway? Out of ANY building in town that fight could've taken place in? How much good luck can one hero have, anyway?

Either way, the couple will take it. "So, we're in the clear?" the duo asked.

"Yeah. Like I'm going to issue a warrant for you two over something Skulker and Technus did anyway… You should know me better than that, Danny… umm, and Ember."

"Thanks, Tuck." Dan-ber smiled. Tucker was oddly disturbed by the fact that Danny had Ember's smile…

"No problem… Umm… So what about… you know… this?" he said, gesturing his hands to indicate Dan-ber's body.

"Well, hopefully we can figure this out. Shouldn't be too hard to pull out."

"That's what she said!" Tucker exclaimed. Suddenly, Tucker was grabbed by his shirt collar and pulled in close to a frowning Dan-ber. This time, only Ember's voice spoke. "Say that again and I won't care that you're Baby-Pop's best friend, I will punish you."

"Eep… Yes, ma'am!" gulped Tucker, struggling to get out of her grasp. Dan-ber released her grip. "Huh? What'd we miss? Oh, yeah… Tucker, bad choice of words." The duality of voices resumed itself, as if Danny's mind had to catch up. It was worth noting that the individual halves could still assert themselves when needed. Just like a relationship, if one thinks about it in that sense…

It was an hour later in Ember's realm and Dan-ber was focusing on splitting up. There had to be a way that the two could be individuals again. The duo tried focusing energies in two opposite directions. They tried thinking of hateful things about each other, mostly of the old days, hoping that it'll trick the fused body into coughing up their own selves. They tried just thinking about their own bodies. Nothing worked. They were still one, man and woman, symbiote and host. It sighed…

"What do we do? … I don't know. What should we do? … How should we know? We asked you?" Dan-ber said, as if Danny and Ember were conversing with each other.

"Well… We tried everything. All that's left is crazy ideas like using Desiree's wishing powers or trying to guess some sort of deactivation phrase like 'I'm pulling out'."

As soon as those last three words left his/her mouth, a blue/green aura burst from Dan-ber's being, blinding the combined body. Moments later, Danny regained his vision and looked around. The first thing in the messy apartment he noticed was Ember sprawled on the bed nearby. Something worked! But what surprised him was…

"Wait, wait… That's what splits us up? 'I'm pulling out'? What kinda code-phrase is that?!" he said, blushing. Perhaps it would be a good thing that fusion won't happen on an often basis.

"It's one that you get when you combine two hormone-driven minds, dipstick. Oh, don't give me that look. You're not exactly Mr. Innocent, we both know that." snickered Ember, sitting up and giving him an amused look.

"So… How was that for you?" Danny asked, curious. He sat down on the bed next to Ember. She stared at him, smirk still on her face.

"Wasn't bad, really. Too bad you wouldn't stop chattering when you were my brain…" she said.

"Wait. You were the brain."

"Huh? No, you were. I had the body."

"Huh…" Danny paused, mulling over it. "Maybe that's a part of it. In a sense, we're both the brain and body, working together."

"Mm… Sounds about right, I guess. Next time, stop yammering so much, ok?" she said, lightly slapping him upside the head. Danny grunted.

"Alright, flame…

"Think we'll see the last of that combined effort from the Reject Geek Squad there?" Ember asked, lying down and spreading herself out across the bed in true slacker fashion.

Danny frowned. He knew the answer to that one. "Hmm… Remember that story I told you around a month ago…? The one about my dark side?"

"The one about going to the future and finding out it sucked?"

"Yeah. SkulkTech was one of the future's 'bright' outcomes… Although in that time period he called himself SkulkTech 9.9. So, I'm sure we'll face an upgraded version at some point…" Danny said, a serious foreboding look on his face, the kind of dramatic look superheroes get when they know a dark fate is coming. Ember noticed and grabbed him by the back of his hazmat top, pulling back so that he fell back on the bed to lay next to her.

"Chill, Baby-Pop. So he'll return. We'll just get stronger too. It's what everyone does in this competition we call life, right?" Ember said, smiling at him. It was one of those rarely-seen caring smiles she saved for moments like this, now that she had someone that actually cared about her.

"The more things change…" Danny started, smiling back at her.

"The more things stay the same." Ember finished. And then bopped him on the head. "Unoriginal as usual." she said before drawing Danny in for a kiss before he could gripe about it. Kissing, the ultimate silencer…

Soon enough, Danny put his concerns on the back burner. So what if certain aspects of that rejected future would still come to pass? As long as he continues doing what he does best, things won't turn out nearly as bad as Dark Dan's future. That's what Danny believed to be true. At one moment, he realized that another aspect of the dark future sort of came true after all: Phantom would indeed fuse together with another ghost. And that realization made him believe that the future is already brighter, considering who he fused with this time around.

And so, one day at a time, time moves to the future… But that seems a little too cheesy of an ending, really. The next morning, Ember woke up and slowly loosened herself from her sleeping boyfriend's grasp. Gathering together her clothes from the previous night, she noticed something sticking out of her pants pocket. She couldn't believe she forgot that in that whole struggle yesterday. She pulled the item in question out.

Replica or not, she had to respect the fact that the crappy soon-to-be-destroyed failed museum had sheet music of Metallica's first album on display. Definitely a great steal for her music collection, even if monetarily worthless. Little did she know that Danny was sometimes a light sleeper. He had stayed still with one eye open to watch the show that was his girlfriend wandering around bare-assed. When he noticed her pull out what looked like papers and saw a familiar look in her eye, the look of successful mischief, he couldn't help but smirk…

'Stealing again, 'Catwoman'? Should've known.' he thought. Some things will truly never change.

Author's Note: There you have it. The fourth part, done. I hope the ending wasn't TOO fluffy, considering how rowdy Ember's attitude usually is.

As I said before, I will have a Poll about the next part. I will have a couple of possible plot ideas and even an option of "This is good enough. Consider this complete.", in case anybody thinks I'm beginning to 'jump the shark'. Lol. Along with reviews, please take the time to vote. Thank you.


	5. It Had To Happen Sometime

Author's Note: No votes on my Poll? Hmm… Perhaps that's only useful for writers/stories that actually have a sizeable fanbase… Ah well, I'm just gonna choose an option, remove it from the Poll and leave it up anyway in case somebody wants to actually vote on what plot I should use next. I just thought it'd be something cool to do for a little audience participation, know what I mean?

Disclaimer: Do I really need to do this every chapter? Eh, either way, I don't own anything.

Part 5: It Had To Happen Sometime

Amity Park was a small city, by most standards. Therefore, it wasn't very surprising that Amity's biggest bank wasn't too huge. It also didn't have as much money in its vault like some of the bigger banks in major metropolises. But as with other viable targets of criminal activity, try convincing the local scum of that fact. 'You expect us to drive all the way to freakin' Green Bay or something to go for one huge score? Ha! Too much hassle! High security, getting there, getaway cars, where to get away to, how to get outta the city with it, and so on.' a criminal might reply.

Another evident factor was that some of the rogues in town are undead, therefore one would be hard-pressed to get them to haunt somewhere else, the territorial pricks that they are.

Such as the case with this current bank robbery in progress. In broad daylight, oddly enough. The leader of this small gang of living-impaired thugs appeared to be a carnival lion tamer, with a whip in one hand and a small wooden chair in the other. His somewhat-skeletal appearance was nearly comical due to the crazy, slightly torn-up carny outfit. A frilly shirt with a painted-on clown face on the chest, baggy pants, even a black silk bandanna on his head. Some citizens had almost laughed until he had cracked the whip, demonstrating that it's a pretty long whip (or perhaps stretchable) and it could apparently cut through things like a sword, as the remains of a security camera proved.

It kinda made some people wonder what the little chair could do, as they lay on the ground in typical bank robbery procedure. The things people think about when they're used to living in a town with a constant metahuman/ghost presence…

The undead lion tamer motioned his chair toward the teller desks, a signal for his ghostly minions to go forward and find the vault. Three ghostly carny folk obeyed orders, swarming behind the barrier of 4 teller stations and into the back area, searching for the vault.

"Yeah, dis shouldn't take too long. Hehehe… Da boss would surely be happy wit' dis." chuckled the lion tamer, an accent to his voice. A nearby minion looked at him questioningly.

"But why do we have to do this like a bank holdup? These guys couldn't do anything against us anyway if they tried. We could've just barged in and taken the money, easy peasy." asked the lowly carnival hand.

"Very true. But where's da fun in dat? Besides, wit' all da ghostly activity in dis damn town, the fuzz might have some of dem anti-ghost weapons. Haveta play this safe if the boss wants his money wit'out a problem, right?" he replied, passively cracking the whip so it cut a table in half. Apparently, a citizen was slowly trying to get up into a crouching position so he could try and move. The whip-crack at the table right next to the poor man was a warning shot.

"Right."

Suddenly, the sound of energy blasts could be heard from within the bank's back areas. A trap? Perhaps some wannabe hero trying his luck? No matter. Carnies are a hardy folk…

"Now relax, ladies and gentlemen. I'm sure dat's just some guard finding out what happens when ya interrupt da performance in progess! As long as ya stay in yer seats, everything'll be aces, alright?" the lion tamer announced, clutching the whip threateningly as he floated slowly around the bank lobby to make sure the audience was truly a captive one. (Although he really didn't have to check the hostages, seeing as anti-ghost weapons weren't exactly available to the public yet.)

Moments later, when he had his back turned toward the teller area, an ecto-blast hit his chair from behind, shattering it to little wooden splinters which soon evaporated to nothing by the time he turned around to see who had fired at him.

White hair. Black-n-white hazmat suit. Ghost powers… It had to be him, the famed Danny Phantom! Except… wasn't he taller?

"I'm afraid your paycheck bounced, sir!" the hero said cheekily. Wait a sec, that was a girl's voice. Who the heck are they dealing with?

"I should'a known one of you heroes would do something. But who da hell are you? I heard of dis Danny Phantom, but dey say dat he's a guy. …And taller too." said the lion tamer, glaring at the clearly-feminine heroine as she floated over the teller desks, knowing that a stand-off was in progress. The girl did seem to look a lot like a smaller version of Amity's hero, except that her hair was done up in a ponytail and that she was starting to develop a chest. Then again, not a lot of people know that she's actually Danny's clone…

"For a dumb carnival guy, you're quite observant. Nah, I'm just his cousin, Dani, with an I. So… Shall we fight, cause I know you aren't going to go quietly." Dani quipped, fists clenched and glowing with power as she instantly prepared for combat. She wasn't disappointed as his reaction.

"Damn right we're fightin'!" the ghoul roared, raising the whip to crack it at her. However, when he flicked it forward, it…didn't fly forward. More than that, it seemed to have been caught on something behind him, which should've been impossible for the razor-sharp power of the whip. Growling, he turned around. His minions were all gone, replaced by a red suit of technological armor, the end of his whip gripped in one of its hands.

"Wha?! What the hell are you?!"

The armor started pulling at the whip as if reeling in a fish, thus starting an impromptu tug of war match. "As much as I'd like to quote Ozzy Osbourne and say that I'm Iron Man, I'll just let my fightin' do the talkin'." Valerie replied, grabbing another part of the whip and pulling, dragging the stubborn ghost toward her bit by bit as he (tried to) plant his feet firmly on the ground.

"Impossible! My whip should be cutting you to shreds! It cuts through anything!" bellowed the lanky carny, trying desperately to pull his whip back to him. It never dawned on him that he could have a chance if he just let go…

"Dani, check the hostages. I doubt this goon will be much trouble now." The Red Huntress calmly ordered. Dani could almost tell that Valerie had a confident smirk on her face. "No problem-o. By the way, wasn't it Danny's turn to patrol today?" she asked as she floated over to the closest hostage, some of which were already getting up.

"Yeah, it was. But he had something important today." Val answered as she yanked the lion tamer in and grabbed him by the neck. "Alright, scum… Talk! Who sent you?" she growled at him.

"Wh…what? Sent? I dunno what you mean…" the tamer quivered. Classic two-bit thug behavior… Why do they even try lying these days?

"Bull. You don't even act like you can even run a poker game. You're clearly a lackey, I can see it in your eyes. Not to mention, this isn't the first incident we dealt with lately that featured some carnival gimmick. Now are you gonna talk or do we have to do this the hard way? Go ahead and get macho about you being already dead. I got ways around that. Notice how you can't phase out of my grip?"

The last sentence stopped the lion tamer cold. He did notice. Perhaps she wasn't bluffing about bringing the pain… Still… "I can't… No, I can't talk! He'll destroy me… I hate being dead as much as da next evil ghost but I at least wanna exist. Lemme go! Please! Just lemme go!"

That earned him a punch to the face. "That doesn't get me a name, clown shoes."

"No… Please, no… I… C'mon! You guys could probably figure it out! Do I really have to talk?! I wasn't gonna hurt nobody, honest! We just wanted da money, that's all! We're not killers! At least I'm not, anyway! Da boss might be, I'm not sure! Lemme go and I'll just float away. You can keep da whip! It's a good whip! Might help you against other criminal scum! See? I'm not such a bad guy!"

Ceaseless yammering, another typical nervous behavior. Good thing a knuckle sandwich can prove to be a good way of stopping that. "Sigh… You're only making it worse for yourself. How's it going, Dani?" the Huntress called. Dani waved back at her. "All good here! No injuries at all. A few rattled people, but that's normal." Dani floated back over, giving a light wave to the group of newly-free citizens. "So what's with slapnuts over here? I thought you would've canned him with the Thermos by now."

"Remember the other carny-related crimes lately? One of these bozos must know something." The Huntress gave the undead thug a good shake for emphasis. Dani sighed. When Val wanted, she could be perfect for aiding the cops with interrogations…or helping Batman 'scare up' some info, pun fully intended. All that was missing was the brooding.

Sometimes, Dani didn't know how Tucker managed to survive when Valerie had her 'time of the month'. Then again, that might explain those few days out of the month where he completely buries himself in between mayoral work and hanging out with Danny, Ember, and Sam…

Speaking of their friends, Dani could probably guess why her 'cousin' had to bow out of his turn at patrolling the city. After all, he had been mentioning that he should just get it over with, since it'd be good for the long run. Another possibly telling factor was that Amity had yet to see any evidence of the 'loose cannon' today… As Val continued to give the defeated carny a rough grilling for information, Dani wondered how things would turn out for the couple.

Most superheroes knew little to no fear. But even with his ghostly powers, Danny Fenton still had to do what some ordinary teenagers had to face: introduce a possibly controversial girlfriend to his parents. Sure, he knew that he would stay with Ember no matter what Mom and Dad would say. After all, it's been getting close to a year now and he still had a pretty good feeling about their bond.

Still, it would be nice if they could avoid going through the old-as-dinosaurs "in-laws" stereotype. He certainly had enough of disgruntled parents when he had his relationship with Sam, that's for sure. He still couldn't believe the nerve of Mr. Manson that one night he picked Sam up for a date, answering the door armed with a metal baseball bat and a cold glare…Danny knew that Mr. Manson wasn't in the mood to play baseball, that was certain. He would sometimes wonder if the Manson parents had any relation with a certain insane murderer. It was a relief when Sam finally had enough and put them in their place with the help of her incredibly supportive grandmother, but the damage had already been done. It wasn't the poor Goth's fault, not at all. But his superhero responsibilities were stressful enough without the prospect of dealing with perpetual extreme disdain about his love life.

Presently, the least he could try and do is have a proper introduction of Ember to his parents and hope that she didn't have to put up with the same thing, with his parents being ghost hunters and all…

Well, they did accept him for his superhero counterpart when he revealed his identity… So it shouldn't turn out too bad, right? Right…?

"Earth to Baby-Pop… Baby-Pop, come in." Ember said, having floated into his room minutes ago only to find him pacing around, seemingly zoned out in thought. "Danny!" she said louder, waving a black-gloved hand in front of his face when he paced by her. She frowned. It wasn't often she actually called him by name, mostly because the both of them actually liked it when she called him by her two favorite nicknames. Being the wild woman she tended to be, she didn't do well with stressing out and she certainly couldn't control herself when it came to talking to others that were stressing out.

She drew her guitar…

Danny's thoughts were mind-shatteringly interrupted by a loud rendition of the main hook of a certain AC/DC song… And she sang…

"Dirty deeds…. DONE DIRT CHEAP!

Dirty deeds… DONE DIRT CHEAP!

Dirty deeds… DONE DIRT CHEAP!

Dirty deeds and they're done dirt cheap!

Dirty deeds and they're done dirt cheap!"

Ears ringing and nerves shot from the surprise, it had taken a few moments for Danny to get his bearings and wrest the guitar away from Ember, who had a joyfully mischievous look on her face.

"Em, what did you do that for! Argh, my ears…" Danny asked, shaking his head to try and stop the ringing. Ember used the distraction to grab her guitar back, slinging it on her back like a sheathed sword.

"Well, you were totally spaced out. How else was I supposed to get your attention, Dipstick?" she asked like it was the most logical obvious thing in the world, a trouble-promising smirk on her face. Danny loved that smirk. She knew that and would take advantage of that fact. To his relief, Danny's ears finally began to stop aching as much.

It was fortunate that his parents were currently down in the (mostly-soundproof) lab and that Jazz was currently out with a friend. "Yeah… Yeah, good point, I guess… I'm just nervous, that's all." he answered awkwardly, not comfortable with admitting that to the woman who obviously had no lack of confidence at all. Funny how he could face Pariah Dark just on courage and a powered-up suit of armor and end up fretting over a simple conversation with his parents. Her smirk turned into an honest smile.

She could say what she would about being an untamed rock-n-roll megastar. But at the end of her day, she would always be glad to have ended up with the Dipstick. Unlike her past lovers (both when she was alive and during her afterlife), Danny actually cared about more than just what was within her tight leather pants/tank-top or the 'notability' of having a celebrity trophy girlfriend. She thought his occasional displays of honest timidity were adorable, a definite contrast from his usual looks of determination while 'on the job' and a reminder that he was very different from the selfish, macho assholes of her past. If it weren't for the fact that what was about to happen was so damn important to him, she'd playfully pinch his cheek while mockingly (but truthfully) telling him how cute he is. Perhaps later…

"Relax, Baby-Pop. I'll behave. Promise." Ember capped her promise with a quick kiss on the lips. "As long as I behave, the ball would be in their court, you know. I just hope that having a half-ghost son made them rethink their 'all ghosts are evil' stance." she added, feeling his arms come around her in a light embrace. Danny smiled lightly, watching her flaming hair flicker and dance in its usual almost-hypnotic way.

"I think they thought about it. They haven't been bragging about dissections or experiments even half as much as they did before I revealed myself." he said, chuckling lightly at how ridiculous that must sound. Ember playfully smacked him upside the head. "Ow!"

"Very funny, wise ghost…"

"Umm… Actually, I wasn't joking."

"Oh…"

Minutes later, Danny was making his way down the stairwell to the Fenton Lab in the basement, Ember invisibly trailing behind. It was a spacious workplace with all sorts of tech and tools lying around, some arranged in order and some strung about in a mess. It was somewhat obvious who had worked on what, Jack Fenton being the cheerful oaf that he was. In the very back of the lab sat the very nexus of Danny's whole teenage life, the Ghost Portal. Had it been open, he would've seen the usual liquid-like green swirls and ripples of the portal itself. But currently, it was closed. That was good, since it meant that possible criminal activity might be just of the mortal sort that police could handle. (Little did he know…)

His parents were nearby the portal, both working on…a satellite dish? He walked over, careful not to trip over anything. "Hey Mom, Dad. What're you guys working on?" he said, as casually as possible.

Maddie Fenton was the first to speak, her chipper attitude ever-so-present. "Hey, hun! Oh, this? Well, we just thought it'd be neat to develop a sort of city-wide ghost radar to help you with your superhero job. That way, if your little ghost detection breath doesn't work because a crime's happening completely on the other side of town, this baby'll let you know."

"Yeah, son! Nothing like good ol' efficiency, right?" Jack piped up, grinning at him as he focused on his work, turning a wrench to tighten up a bolt. Danny, nodding, could see the logic. Even after all this time, he still couldn't determine the approximate range of his ghost sense.

"Cool, Dad. Uhh… It's not portable, is it?" he asked, noting that the device didn't exactly look easy to carry, taking up a good deal of the worktable's real estate. Jack's grin disappeared… "Aw, fudge! I knew I forgot something! Portability! Everybody loves portability now." groaned the large ghost hunter before he proceeded to mumble in dejection.

Maddie put a hand on his back. "Oh, cheer up, dear. It's still useful. It could be like Danny's own Bat Computer. You don't see Batman hauling the Batcave's computer around everywhere, do you?" she said. Danny couldn't help but snicker a little. They'd soon know how much like Batman their son had become. Well, if they knew about the whole Batman and Catwoman connection, that is…

"I guess so…" Jack said, still somewhat dejected. He then proceeded to give the machine a good once-over look. "Well, either way, it's all finished. Shall we give it a test run?" the portly patriarch asked, suddenly excited about the prospect of a new invention actually working.

"Uhh… Dad?" Danny called, trying to get their attention. However, Maddie kept Jack's attention… "Sure, hun! We can see if there's any spooks in town." she replied, ever alert for any ectoplasmic threats. Jack immediately went to the machine's control panel, beneath its sizable monitor, and pressed a few buttons to power it up.

"Guys? I need to talk to you about something." Danny said, suddenly having a bad feeling about this since Ember was hovering nearby, still invisible. "Can't this wait?"

"Hush, Danny. In a minute." Maddie kindly replied. It was never easy to drag his parents' attention away from a new invention when it came to testing it. It must be their work ethic… The monitor came to life, showing a detailed map of Amity Park. It reminded Danny of the map screen of Lost Santos within Grand Theft Auto 5's pause menus.

"But Mom, this is important." Danny said, almost in vain as Jack and Maddie's eyes were glued to the monitor. With the press of a few more buttons, the scanning process began. What looked like rippling waves of sonar appeared on the monitor, representing the machine's signal being sent out. A few dots appeared on the screen. A couple were shown at Amity's central bank, oddly enough. A few others were scattered throughout the town, either on the move or stationary. All of which didn't seem to be causing any trouble, as the device also seemed to show whether ectoplasmic energy was being used or not.

Then, there was Fenton Works. Strange. It looked like two dots were placed upon their location… Jack and Maddie frowned. "Jack, can you zoom in on us, sweetie?" Maddie asked, her tone suddenly seemed more serious. Danny gulped, hoping they wouldn't jump the gun, almost literally.

"Sure, Mads!" he excitedly demonstrated the monitor's zoom-in/zoom-out feature. A part of him was glad to make sure that every aspect of a device worked to perfection. He just didn't remember to make sure of that sometimes… He couldn't be blamed for that, could he?

Sure enough, when the monitor only showed the layout of Fenton Works, there were clearly two ectoplasmic signatures, one right next to the other.

"Mom? Dad? I really need to talk to you guys. Now." Danny said, his tone getting serious.

"Son, there's a problem here. We have an intruder, it seems. I'm sorry, but your talk can wait." Jack said, immediately lumbering over to a nearby Fenton Rocket Launcher.

"Dad, no! This is urgent! Please!" the poor boy started to panic. This was not how he wanted this to turn out. He turned to his mom. "Mom, I… I know what that other presence is!"

"Really, Danny?" Maddie looked concerned, wondering why her son would hide something. What secrets would he need to hide, now that he's a renown superhero? Even so, her son's word was good enough. "Jack, honey! Put the launcher down! It's all clear!"

Jack groaned. "Aww! I wanted to use this…" Sometimes he could be such a man-child, both wife and son had to admit about him… Jack walked over to them.

"Now Danny, what's going on?" Maddie asked, not sure whether to be worried or just concerned.

"Umm… Well… umm… heh… This is… well… You see… I brought someone here to meet you guys…" he said, suddenly timid now that the moment of truth was finally here.

Maddie smiled. "Oh, a ghost friend of yours, I assume?"

"Uhh... Not exactly just a friend… She… umm…" he trailed off. What bad timing for his mind to suddenly draw a blank. Ember, watching, barely repressed a groan of embarrassment. How many times had she got in her own parents' faces when she was alive? She lost count. Even so, she could probably guess why he's flustering…

"She? A lady ghost?" Maddie asked. Then, Jack burst into the conversation.

"Hold on a minute! More than a friend? She? I see what's going on…" he said, suddenly narrowing his eyes, looking around at wherever the ghost could possibly be hiding.

Then, Maddie seemed to get it. "Wait… Danny? Are you…?"

Danny seemed to be sweating. What was going on in their heads? Was this not the right time to introduce Ember? Do they disapprove?

A small blue flame appeared out of nowhere a couple of feet behind Danny, surprising the two elder Fentons. The giveaway blue glow and the crackling of flames caused Danny to facepalm. She had decided to take matters into her own hands.

The little blue flame grew until it was the approximate height of a human. Then, as quickly as it came, it vanished. It left behind one impatient rock diva, visible to all.

"Hi. I'm Ember McLain. And yes, I'm Danny's girlfriend now. There. It's 'out there'. Sorry, Baby-Pop, but the drama was re-killing me." Ember said as she floated over and put an arm around Danny, casual as ever.

The two parents stammered, trying to put together a good first question to ask while sounding like gibberish. Ember wasn't surprised. Necrophilia, after all, was a major human taboo… Who knows how that would come into play with Danny's unique situation of being half-human.

Maddie seemed to snap herself out of it first, mostly out of frustration at her usually-sharp mind's momentary haze. "Alright, alright! Okay… May I ask how?"

"Uh, how what, Mrs. Fenton?" Ember answered, unsure what she meant.

"How… how this came about?" she said, gesturing a hand toward the couple at the word 'this'.

"Well… Umm… You want the whole story or just the cliff notes?" the ghost asked back, suddenly realized that she didn't exactly know how to clearly explain their strange-but-fruitful love.

"Whatever you're comfortable with, umm… dear." replied Maddie, hesitant to call a ghost by a term she used to love referring to Sam as. Technically, she still calls Sam that whenever she came over, but it just wasn't the same after what the Manson parents did…

"Okay…" Damn, this was awkward. "Well, I… It used to be that the Dipstick and I would fight constantly. I wanted to conquer the world, he desired to protect it… Sigh, yes, you could say that I have a criminal record." Ember added when she noticed Maddie's face harden into an untrusting glare. "But I'm not that way anymore. Dipstick here saw to that… Before him, I had somebody else for a boyfriend. Another 'criminal' rival of Danny's. But… Well, I guess I know the downsides of dating somebody like that. He was selfish, greedy, he refused to treat me to anything… The list goes on." She said, adding a passive waving-away hand-gesture at that point.

"One day, when Skulker… you might have seen him. A mechanical-looking ghost obsessed with hunting? Whatever, anyways, Skulker and I had Dipstick cornered. But personally, I had already had enough of his crap. So I backstabbed him. Heh… What a way to do it too. Wait 'til he's just about to get what he wants and then BAM! Take it right away." At this point, Ember was rambling. She knew it. But she didn't know how else to tell this kind of story to Danny's ghost-hunting parents.

"So yeah. I saved your kid. I didn't do it for him at the time. I did it for me. It was over and I needed to go out in a huge way. It's the way I am. But… well, it hurt. The whole thing. What he did, what could've been, my self-esteem because of that… Well, you know how heartbreak goes. But Baby-Pop… He came to me. Tried to make me feel better. We were enemies and yet he still took the time to come up to me and be an ear to listen to my problems. He could've very well just counted it a victory and flew home, you know. But he didn't.

"It touched me, I admit. And it got me thinking. Long story short, we called a truce. Then we started to just chill together. Hang out, take turns playing some music on my guitar, so on… Then we started to get to know each other. Before we knew it, I'm helping to patrol the city for him and he's proved to be wonderful company. Yeah, I know. Not your storybook relationship, but here we are." Ember finished. Right away, she began to wonder if she really stepped her foot in it this time.

Jack and Maddie both looked like they were deep in thought, processing the story. It definitely wasn't a regular kind of parenting conundrum. Jack sighed. "We spent most of our adult lives hunting ghosts. And now our son is in love with one. There's a word for this, isn't there?" he said, as if he was coming to terms with it.

"Yes, dear. It's irony." answered Maddie, almost quietly. Danny didn't like the sound of this one bit. But he would see where this goes. Ember remained quiet as well. She didn't want to stir up any more trouble than she might have. She held herself closer to Danny, however.

Moments later, Jack's face seemed to change to one of resolve. "I gotta admit, Maddie… We must've done a real good job raising our kids. I mean, managing to reform a ghost? I guess that takes real compassion to do that, ghost or not. Hmm… How long have you two been together?" he asked Ember, curiously.

"About… ten months, I think." she answered, feeling a little cautious.

"Ten months. Guess it's no surprise why you two would be sneaky about it around us." Jack laughed lightheartedly. "And there hasn't been one problem? No 'urges to dominate the planet' or anything?"

"Wow, that's presumptuous of you." Ember answered sarcastically, frowning bitterly.

"Dad!" Danny groaned.

"What? What's wrong?" Jack asked as if he had just heard about the situation. Maddie sighed.

"You made it sound like supervillainy is some sort of mental cancer or something, like we're all born with the urge." Ember snarled, detaching herself from Danny, her hands on her hips.

Maddie took over for Jack. "Now, Ember, I'm sure Jack didn't mean it that way. He's… not the best with talking sometimes."

"Yeah, Ember. He meant well." Danny chimed in, mentally praying that she would give the Fentons a chance. After all, villainous past or not, misconceptions of ghostly motives are a sensitive issue to not just Ember, but a lot of ghosts.

Ember glared at Jack, but sighed after a moment. "If Baby-Pop says you're alright, then you're alright. Fine… But to be clear, how ghosts are depends on the deceased soul. How they were in life, how they died, what their goals and motives were upon time of death, and so on. As for me? When I was alive, I just wanted to become a big rock star that would be remembered as one of the best female rockers ever. Obviously, that got cut short. Don't ask for details, please. That's something I'd only share with those really close to me. But anyways, that was my goal in life. Not to become some sort of "empress of Earth" or some shit."

"Language, young lady!" Maddie instantly snapped, as if a reflex. Danny cringed. That would not be a good impression…

Ember fell silent a moment. Normally, she wouldn't care if her use of foul language pissed somebody off. But this was her boyfriend's mother. She wanted to brush the criticism off like usual, but she still wanted to prove that she was a good match for Mrs. Fenton's baby boy. "Ummm… Sorry? I guess?" was her timid answer, having never been put in such a position before.

Maddie smiled. "Oh, it's alright, Ember. We were all young once. Besides, you rock-n-rollers cuss all the time nowadays, huh? Well, I'm not going to ask you to stop altogether, but just tone it down around Jack and I, alright?" she said, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Even Danny was stunned by now. His parents were starting to accept her as a person!

"Sure… That's fine, Mrs. Fenton. Umm… Anything else you wanted to know…?" she asked, hoping that the awkward moment was over.

Unfortunately…

"Yes, actually." Jack replied, a serious look on his face. "Seeing as you kept this secret from us for ten months, I have to ask… Did you two 'do it' yet?"

Both Ember and Danny's faces became red as tomatoes. Well, at the very least, Jack definitely started to accept her as Danny's girlfriend…

Batman never had to put up with anything like this with Catwoman! Not even Spider-Man had to put up with this! Well, maybe explaining Black Cat to Mary Jane or Aunt May… Danny wasn't sure on that one.

Both teens sounded something like "Umm, I…well, that is… He... She… um, 'do it'? Err…well…Hehe… That's…umm…" and so on. Maddie's face fell. It was evidently clear, if it wasn't a possibility already with the things she heard about female rock stars's "extracurricular activities"…

"Oh, Danny…" she said, in that all-too-well-known tone of a sorely disappointed mother. That snapped Ember out of her stammering.

"Mrs. Fenton, please! We… only started doing that a couple of months ago. We both wanted to be sure about 'us' first, and… we… umm…" She knew one thing: Danny would owe her big time for this whole fiasco. This was the smallest she ever felt in her afterlife, besides the initial transition from life to undeath, of course. "Well… What can I say? I love my Baby-Pop…"

Yep, she felt small alright. The rebellious side of her fumed at how girly she sounded just now, even though it couldn't deny the truth of the statement. Maddie simply nodded, as if storing the fact away as evidence. The mother looked toward Danny. "And what do you have to say for yourself, young man?" Everyone knows that kind of motherly tone… The "Your ass is about to be grounded for life" tone.

Danny did not see this coming at all. He imagined that Clockwork probably did and is now probably laughing his temporal ass off. Couldn't he give his own apprentice one heads-up? Just one? If he had to pick an incident he wished he'd gotten a warning about, it would be this one. Hands down. He felt trapped against a wall.

"Uh, Ember's right, Mom. We didn't want our relationship to be one that's just about… well, that… Even so, that wasn't the first thing we thought about when we started dating. A couple of months ago, the subject was brought up. We had a long talk. Maybe it was the fact that we both got the short ends of the sticks when it came to relationships, but we decided to just see if there came a time when we felt ready for it. Ya know, taking it nice and slow?"

"Dipstick, don't say 'nice and slow' right now…" Ember groaned. With her usually unruly mind bringing up that double-entendre, the poor ghost couldn't be any more embarrassed. Her dipstick owed her an entire music store's worth of stolen loot after this.

"Sorry, Em… Well… Days later, we had both thought about it. And well… Umm…" Danny trailed off.

"You two were 'ready'?" Maddie finished for him, like ripping off duct tape off of somebody's mouth. Damn, she could be very direct when she wanted to. Danny nodded.

At this point, Jack interjected himself. "Did you use protection?" Maddie looked at him as if she wanted to say 'Really? That's your big question?'

"Umm… Yes?" Danny said as if he was just blindly guessing an answer. Ember facepalmed.

Jack clapped him on the shoulder. "Alright then. I guess that's fine by me. A little surprising to say the least, but as long as you two genuinely care for each other. Who wants fudge!?" he said, abruptly bringing up his other favorite topic to end the conversation. Now it was Maddie's turn to facepalm.

"Jack, are you nuts?!" Maddie snapped, clearly not done with the subject. Jack turned to her. "Maddie dear, I'm sure I don't need to remind you of our younger days." he simply said with a smirk. Maddie blushed while Danny stuck his fingers in his ears, chanting "Not picturing that! Totally not picturing that!". Ember chuckled at her boyfriend's agony. Ok, so maybe not an entire music store of loot... But he still owed her!

As Jack left to head upstairs to get some well-deserved fudge, Maddie turned her attention back to the couple, Danny still looking a little disturbed by Jack's parting comment while Ember held his hand.

"Sigh… Well, as disappointed as I am, I guess I shouldn't be too mad about that. After all, I guess I should be glad that this relationship shows some sort of proof that some ghosts can be reasoned with." Maddie said in a calm but resigned tone that clearly projected the subtle message of 'That's it, I give up!'.

"Mom…?" Danny asked, knowing there was more to this than Maddie was letting on.

"It's alright. I'll just chalk this up as another aspect of your superhero career. Their love lives can get a little weird, right? Besides, I would suppose you two would have to be happy with each other for you to want to introduce her to us, Danny. A step forward in the relationship, huh? Well… that's a relief then. You two have my blessing, then." Maddie said, a light smile on her face.

"Really? Wow… Cool!" Danny said, a smile on her face.

"Um, we're not going to have one of those cheesy 'after-school special' moments where we all hug, are we?" Ember asked, suddenly getting a bad vibe of the overly-sappy sort.

"Well, I wasn't really thinking of that. But now that you mention it, why don't I welcome you to the family, dear." was Maddie's only reply before engulfing Ember in a hug. The diva could only squirm and protest within the Fenton matriarch's grasp. At least this was better than being rejected…

"Wait til Jazz hears she'll eventually have a new 'sister'." chirped Maddie. This triggered a random fact within Ember's mind that Danny once warned her about… Wasn't Jazz Fenton one of those crazy 'super-fans' that get clingy upon meeting their favorite idol? Yeah, Danny had better keep his sister under control if he knew what was good for him…

Later…

It was the middle of the night and only the drunks and the night-shift workers were out and about, which meant a decent chance of a nice quiet raid for music merch for Ember. It took a stern talking-to, but she managed to get Danny to admit that she did deserve to 'prowl' a bit after all that awkwardness. For a while during the beginning of their bond, Danny often wondered how she could get away with her 'prizes' after each raid. One would think the police would've caught on by now.

Nowadays, Danny just had Tucker secretly deal with the financial impact. It wasn't difficult or upsetting for the young mayor as Danny's superheroics (specifically, the Disasteroid incident) did manage to garner some reward money from, believe it or not, the government. Needless to say, Danny didn't have to worry about college costs or anything lime that, but still, he let Tucker deal with the money, since the constant criminal activity (ghostly or otherwise) ended up leaving the victimized parts of town needing money for repairs.

In this particular case, Danny would occasionally wonder if he was whipped, using a roundabout way to pay for Ember's every desire and letting her think she was ripping off the town a la Catwoman. His common sense would quickly disperse such thoughts. After all, for one thing, she caught her own share of petty criminals during her outings.

Ember set her sights on Amity Mall. It had a couple of stores that could be worth pilfering though. Perhaps some rare rock CDs? Maybe another kickass instrument? All it took was one phase through a wall…

As soon as she phased in, something felt… off. Then again, she was undead so she always felt off. But that kind of 'off' was normal to the point where she felt normal. This wasn't the usual. No, it was that negative sense of foreboding. Like there was something afoot but one couldn't place it until it was too late. She drew her guitar. Perhaps she wasn't the only one to think of the idea of raiding the mall…

Some asshole would soon learn that the privilege belonged only to her!

As she floated along the mall's second floor toward the center, the feeling of unease grew. Whoever was here wasn't human. Not unless humans finally started to develop meta-powers like in those anime shows about chi-powered macho men beating the crap out of each other… or perhaps humans with strange powerful objects, like those card-battling anime shows.

No, this was clearly ghostly. The evidence was clear once she came across the center of the mall, which was the food court. It was drastically altered. The hot dog and hamburger joints were left alone, but the pizza, Mexican, Chinese, and other food vendors and restaurants were trashed and replaced with stands selling peanuts, cotton candy, popcorn, and deep-fried everything.

She hid along the banister of the second floor and scoped out the area. Who knows where the strange vandals were at the time. She spotted three beings on the ground floor, apparently arranging the food court tables around into specific areas. All three dressed in bizarre, baggy costumes with glaring, loud colors and clashing patterns. It looked like they'd each paid a nickel for whatever could pass for a clown costume. They all wore a strapped carry-tray like the snack vendors that would go among stadium audiences, hawking their food products.

Ember had heard of a small string of gimmicked incidents as of late, all having to do with the circus or carnivals. Just a couple of hours ago, after Ember met his parents, Danny had gotten a call from Valerie about some foiled bank robbery by an undead lion tamer. It had seemed to bother him, as though this kind of thing was familiar in an unwanted way.

This was apparently the next move from whatever being was responsible. Their true motive was still yet to be deciphered, as the incidents all seemed random and sporadic. Bank robberies, petty vandalism, attacking a random citizen or two, breaking windows, raiding stores… All of which were on a small scale, done by two or three low-powered creeps.

Was it a message? A diversion? A cocky warning of things to come? Or all three? Nobody on Team Phantom knew for sure. But Ember knew one thing: A vigilante's work is never done and some clowns were about to get rocked.

Author's Note: And there's that chapter. With a lead-on for the next one, for a change! Hooray for continuity! I wonder if people can guess which villain I'm planning on using sometime soon. The clues should be obviously easy enough. Even so, we hardly see this particular ass-clown in DP fanfiction at all, it seems. In any case, take a guess!

I do hope I did Maddie and Jack decently enough. I think I did well for the idea of Danny introducing Ember to those two. I would really appreciate feedback about this chapter as a whole. So please Review. Please? Thank you in advance.

Anyways, a reminder: I have a **POLL!** Yes, I still have my poll up for voting on what I should do next, in case anybody's interested. I obviously took down the choice for "meet the parents", but I've added a new one. Perhaps somebody wants an actual story about the short Danny/Sam relationship that was hinted at in this chapter that got broken up by the assholes that are Mr. and Mrs. Manson. Well, now it's a choice. So if you'd like, please vote!

Review!


	6. A Real 'Danniversary'

Author's Note: Six chapters in. Six! Part of me can hardly believe it, since sometimes, inspiration comes few and far between for me. Sad, really, since I do have ideas… It's just hard sometimes to piece it all together. Case in point, some of my other fics that now seem to be "on hiatus"… Damn… I should get back to those. Seriously…

Anyways, my poll didn't get too much of a result, based on the fact that I didn't know that there was an option for putting it on my profile. I just assumed that it would appear there. Didn't help that the option for that is so easy to just plain not see it at all… Rookie mistake, then! Anyways, I did get a couple of votes! So here's your winning plotline!

Disclaimer: How many times must I reiterate this in a multi-chapter fanfic anyway? Either way, I don't own anything I use here.

Part 6: A Real 'Danniversary'

Some time had passed since Danny Fenton had introduced his wild girlfriend to his parents. Needless to say, it was awkward going for the first couple of weeks. First and foremost was her tendency to phase through walls and just appear out of nowhere around the house whenever Danny was home and she felt like visiting. If it wasn't the lack of communication about when she was coming over that bugged Jack and Maddie Fenton, it was the blatant use of ghost powers, seeing as they were always battle-ready whenever a ghostly presence manifested itself. This led to a couple of close calls where Ember almost got her head shot off by a Fenton weapon.

After the second close call, Danny and Ember had a particularly heated conversation about her random sudden appearances around the house. Ember clearly believed that his parents would get used to it eventually, since they did eventually get used to Danny being a ghost-powered superhero. Danny agreed with her logic, but countered by saying that he didn't regularly use his powers at home. Eventually, after some bickering that reminded a passing-by Jazz of how Sam and Tucker got about their "meat vs vegetables" debates, they came to a compromise.

"Alright! Alright. I get it. I can hover around but no teleporting and phasing through walls when they're around. Fine, Dipstick…" Ember had said, feeling pretty dejected. Her ghostly abilities were second nature to her and were pretty fun to use. Resorting to (somewhat) mortal means of moving about a human residence almost seemed…pedestrian (almost literally).

"Em… Aww, come on. You know I didn't mean to upset you, flame. You know my parents are always working on new weapons. Some of them just send you back to the Ghost Zone, but they've come up with a few tricks to completely get rid of any major threats, especially after the Pariah Dark incident… Last thing I want is for you to get sent to oblivion permanently." Danny said, scooching over toward her on the couch and putting an arm around her. Ember remained sullen, but after a moment, leaned into his shoulder.

"Sigh… I know, Baby-Pop. If I'm going down again, I'd rather go out rockin'. Alright, we'll do this your way around here. I'll just come out of the Portal and float up from the basement, ok?" she asked, coming to terms with the limitations. After all, it's only just for Danny's house and it wasn't like she couldn't be with him or anything.

"You can phase through the lab door if it's locked. They usually do that anyway when they're not down there. Security, you know." Danny said. Ember cuddled into his side, moving herself in such a way that she caused Danny's hand to brush against her breast.

"Speaking of security… Your folks aren't around at the moment." Ember purred into his ear. Clearly she wasn't very upset over Danny's imposed restrictions after all. His eyes went wide.

"Here!? In the living room? Ember…!" Danny said in a hushed tone, knowing how she tended to get when she insisted on getting intimate. Rock divas never took 'No' for an answer, unsurprisingly.

"Why not, Baby-Pop? Whatever happened to the 'thrill of the game'? Doesn't the risk turn you on?" she cooed, gently nibbling at his ear. Danny blushed hard. He couldn't deny that Ember's actions had quite an effect on him. But still, it would be mortifying to have any of his family members walk in on them… Then there would be problems.

"You turn me on… Not this risk." he simply replied, the hand that was on Ember beginning to rub the bare part of her back between her tank top and her tight shorts, practically on its own volition. He gulped. She was hard to refuse, he knew that.

"Lower."

"Huh?

"Rub lower." And so his hand went a little southward down her back. "Lower, dipstick." His hand was at the small of her back, right at the top of her shorts. "Almost there. Lower." Her voice sounded amused, as if in on a joke. His hand landed on her firm ass, her form-fitting shorts not hiding the feel of its shape whatsoever. "There we go. Rub that for a while." she huskily whispered. He almost didn't want to. Almost. After all, it was a very public area of the house…

Ember turned his head toward her and proceeded to kiss him. Within seconds, there was plenty of tongue involved. As Danny started to lose himself in the act, he noticed the familiar surrounding blue glow of her fiery hair surrounding them for a moment and then fading back. Without breaking the kiss, he realized that they were on his bed in his bedroom, the door already shut. They had teleported.

The sly devil. She knew what she was doing the whole time! With that in mind, he wasted no time in finding a use for his one free hand…

But that's another story. Or perhaps one that could be left for the imaginations. After all, it doesn't take a ghost hunter to figure out what had happened. The real puzzle was how they managed to keep relatively quiet! The point was that soon enough, the Fentons got used to Ember's often appearances and her brazen personality, even though she did manage to keep her crass humor to a minimum around Mr. and Mrs. Fenton.

The superhero/vigilante life also seemed to be business as usual as of late. The carnival-gimmicked string of odd crimes had diminished, which left Amity's resident guardians puzzled. Who the hell was conducting all this? Valerie and Danny both felt like this was only a mere prelude to something bigger. But a few months went by and not a peep from the mysterious carnies. Even so, it was best not to let the guard down by forgetting about it.

But life had resumed. Between city-wide patrols and going to school, Team Phantom seemed to have things well in hand. Well, almost. After all, Danny was still a bit of a struggling student, grades-wise. Sure, a B- was better than the grades he was racking up before, but he still had his trouble spots. Who among the Team could forget the time that Ember did one of Danny's essay assignments in History for him as a prank and ended up giving him a C- as a result? Mr. Lancer had deemed the essay to be "interesting, at least", as the essay seemed to have tried to compare World War 2 to the struggle between independent rock bands and the 'apparent invasion of the soulless Corporate-sellout bands'. Danny could still remember the first words he had said to her when he came home after discovering the swapped essays: "Gee, Nirvana much, Ms. Cobain?"

Then came the holidays, which were the first in a long time for Ember, aside from the Ghost Zone's Annual Christmas Truce, of course. Having not celebrated Thanksgiving or Christmas (the normal ay of Christmas, anyway) since she was alive, Ember didn't really care about being invited to the celebrations. At first… As Danny pleaded with her with near-sappy words about "family" and "togetherness" and "good cheer" (which caused her to bop him upside the head again for "being unoriginal as usual"), she couldn't help but think momentarily of the relatively-short time that was her life. Her family had been one of wholesome values, or so it seemed during her early childhood. But when she turned 12 and discovered her love of rock music, that's when things changed.

Being as wholesome and "family-friendly" as they were, her parents were disgusted with her newfound taste, claiming it to be "devil music" and "tools of a cult". But they hadn't done anything particularly extreme to dissuade her. However, the Holidays had never went well for her after that initial argument. Nobody talking with her more than necessary, the parents saying subtle negative remarks about her to visiting family members, Ember being served noticeably smaller portions than everyone else at Thanksgiving, lame gifts at Christmas… That old chestnut about being "the ignored child at the Holidays".

The rest Ember didn't want to remember as she focused her attention to her surroundings. Her brief memory lapse made her realize that while the past was the past, it seemed Danny's family actually DID want her to celebrate with them. Or at least Danny wanted her to. Then again, she was fairly certain that he had okayed this with his family beforehand, being the regular 'boy scout' he tended to be at times…

"…and I know Jazz might be a pain with her fangirling, but she's getting better with that. She's starting to see you as more of a regular visitor and she probably won't get so clingy… And I promise that—"

"Alright, Baby-Pop… I'll come." she said, a smile on her face. Danny barely noticed that it was that certain smile that she saved for him.

"Really? Awesome! Umm… What persuaded you?" he asked, curious as he suddenly ducked down to the ground, dodging an incoming ecto-blast from one of Walker's rent-a-cops.

"Well, it's certainly touching that you decided to make a passionate plea like that in the middle of a ghoul gang war like this, that's for sure!" Ember snarked as she simultaneously smashed one minion over the head with her guitar while side-kicking another one in the gut. The kicked minion flew backward and smashed into the side of a dumpster. The duo of vigilantes had interrupted a brazen kidnapping (or "arresting", as the enemies would call it) attempt of a couple hundred people at a crowded movie theater. It wasn't long before the fight was taken outside.

"Why not? It's not like Walker's ever been a real big-time threat anyway." Danny said, double-karate-chopping the last minion across his neck with palms glowing with ecto-power, the chops coming in from both left and right so that the ghostly pawn's neck was sandwiched from the force. Which was unfortunate for Bullet, Walker's second-in-command, because that was the only guard standing in between him and Danny. The others were either too busy with Ember or too far away to intercept Danny.

"Speaking of the ol' warden, what's he up to, Bullet? Last I checked, this isn't his jurisdiction." Danny calmly asked as he floated right up to him, standing face to face. Bullet couldn't help sweating a little. He wasn't as tough as Walker or Danny and he knew it. Still, he wasn't Captain of the Guard for nothing.

"It is now! Warden Walker has been pushing for new regulations to expand our watch to the mortal realm. You mortals are beginning to be a real threat to yourselves and even us. The law has to be—" the chief pig was interrupted by Danny's hand grasping him by the neck.

"Upheld, for your views of justice, blah blah blah, heard it the last ten times." Danny finished for him, clearly bored. Couldn't villains just give up the monologues for something else? At least the ghostly ones? Their routine gimmicks and specific obsessions leave little to creativity for devious speeches if you fight one often enough… Case in point…

"Assaulting an officer…!" gasped Bullet, wriggling out of Danny's grasp. "That's 500 to 1000 years, jagoff!" Danny sighed. He could always count on Warden Walker to do everything by-the-book. So very much by-the-book that if there was a drop of ink misplaced in said book during printing, he would sentence the book itself to prison. Danny once saw the pale warden actually do that. It ranked right up there with the Box Ghost trying to recreate the Pyramids with nothing but crates.

"Funny, that seems to be how much time it would take for you to become strong enough to take on Walker, much less me." Danny replied, easily sidestepping Bullet's fist and then catching his other fist in the palm of his hand. Despite some of his nemeses constantly growing more powerful, there was bound to be a few that would be left in everybody else's dust. Bullet was turning out to be one such case, as Danny smoothly pulled in Bullet's caught fist and used the momentum to Judo-toss him down to the ground.

Meanwhile, the ever-agile Ember was making short work of the squad of undead 'bacon factories', moving from one cop to another with the grace and speed of a cat. Well, if the cat also had a cocky attitude and a musical 'battle-axe'. For a moment, she noted how much stronger she seemed to be ever since she started crime-fighting with Danny. Either that, or Walker's prison guards were becoming sorely lax in their training… Probably the latter. It wasn't as though Danny put her on some sort of very strict daily training regimen or anything like that (although the duo did train). Ending her string of punches, kicks, and guitar-swings, she played one loud, solid riff on her guitar, sending a blast of power at the last remaining ghoul-cop.

The rest was history, as Walker had evidently deigned to remain in the Ghost Zone, confident that Bullet would handle the current mission. His temper would sour by the end of that particular evening.

Christmas turned out to be a real special occasion for Ember especially. As she thought, it turned out to be the first actual Christmas she was truly happy from. As much as Ember turned out to love the pleasant company of the Fenton family, it was the gifts that were quite memorable. Jazz's gift, although not a material one (due to her being unsure of what to get an undead rocker), was nice nonetheless. The oldest Fenton child had come up to her and apologized for her actions from being the stereotypical super-fan. Ember still tried to forget the times where Jazz was practically attached to Ember's hip, asking her inane question after inane question and wearing Ember-related clothes.

"I even got you a little something to make up for my trouble. I couldn't decide on much, so I got you a gift card…" Jazz sputtered, shyly handing the little card over.

"Jazz, no… You keep it. Target, right? You should get yourself some nice things." Ember replied, clapping a hand on Jazz's shoulder in a show of forgiving comradery. Jazz nodded, feeling the urge to hug her, but keeping herself in check. Ember loved attention, but she was glad that Danny's sister decided to actually act like a sane human around her. Everyone's heard the stories about creepy super-fans…

A little later, the family gathered around the tree in the living room for the gift exchange. Maddie's gift was just as sentimental, but it was an actual item. "Here you go, Ember dear. I made this down in the lab. First time I actually made something that actually helps a ghost, but I appreciate a good challenge sometimes! I do hope it works." she said as she handed over what looked like a miniature guitar amp. Ember took it and gave it a curious once-over, turning the little gadget around and over.

"I already have plenty of amps, Mrs. Fenton. What's up with this one?" Ember asked, knowing that there had to be some sort of special ability or function involved. After all, what amp would produce great sound if it's small enough to fit in your hand?

"This one should attach right to your belt there. If I'm right, this should increase your guitar's power as long as it's plugged to the amp. Kind of like a battery pack. I know it's not much, since you're powerful as it is, but… well, it's something, right?" the matron explained, proud of her potential accomplishment.

"Wow! That might help sometimes, actually. I didn't expect you to actually invent something just for me… I mean, me being what I am… I just…. Thanks!" Ember stammered, touched at how much she was accepted as a family member. Maddie immediately pulled her into a crushing hug. Ember squirmed as her head was smothered by Maddie's chest.

"Anytime, Ember dear!" Maddie said, releasing her from the hug. Ember's fiery hair even looked like it was mussed up from the encounter, despite not being hair at all. Danny and Jazz chuckled at her dazed look.

Jack, being Jack, gifted everyone with fudge. What else, right? However, the special part was that he actually made it himself and, despite his usual luck with anything, the fudge actually turned out to be quite delicious (and not strangely animated, like some of the Fentons' past meals). Ember could barely remember the last time she actually ate good fudge from when she was alive.

Danny's gift was, of course, the one she was waiting for the most. And despite her criticisms about how goody-two-shoes he tended to be, he didn't disappoint. She suspected that he had his two human friends help set this up with their power, money, and possible connections. But she didn't mind. Danny had managed to set up a huge concert for Amity, scheduled for New Year's Eve. Ember was slated as the concert's main event, naturally, but she was scheduled to perform with some of her favorite rock bands, a couple of modern bands and a couple of classic rock bands that still had their members together. Her boyfriend had given her a chance to interact with some of her fellow rockers, ones that had made it to world fame status.

Her gift for Danny paled in comparison to this opportunity he presented her. All she got for him was a copy of the new Doomed reboot for his Xbox and a nice framed picture of herself wearing something skimpy, black, and lacy (as something to remember her by whenever she was away). It would seem that she would have to replace the picture with the real deal herself for such a huge surprise…

"Wow… To think that so much happened in a year." Danny remarked as he and Ember sat together in a nice diner, having dinner together as part of a nice evening out. After all, it was their 1-year anniversary and both lovers wanted to do something nice. Ember wanted to do something huge and spectacular, but Danny already pointed out that her ongoing world tour (having been created as a result of her successful New Year's concert) provided plenty of spectacle for the both of them. The couple was lucky that their anniversary landed on a small stretch of time where Ember could come back home for a little while. Of course, Danny would have loved to have gone with her to see the world (and to watch Ember do her thing, over and over and over…), but certain responsibilities like schoolwork and city protection overshadowed his desire to join the tour.

"Well, you got me convinced, Dipstick. The afterlife definitely is better when I'm not obsessed with conquering the planet. Of course, the perks of that are a plus. People actually talk to you… Friends… Fun… Oh, and maybe some guy that hangs around all the time, trying to get in my pants!" Ember said as she nibbled on her steak.

"Hey! You come on to me!" Danny jokingly defended, grinning ear-to-ear.

"I never see you refuse me, Baby-Pop." Ember countered. "See? You men all think the same." She passively waved off the statement as if it was a confirmed fact that didn't need to be said.

"You know I like more than just your body, Em." Danny smirked. He knew where this was going and hoped that what he was about to do would go off without a hitch.

"Oh yeah? Really? Prove it. It's our anniversary and all we're doing is going out to eat?" Ember said, a challenging smirk on her face. "Yeah, you proved you know the kind of place I like to eat, but that's it? Pretty lousy, Danny." Uh oh. His real name. She was serious.

"As if I'm that cheap." Danny muttered as he pulled out a small box from his shirt-jacket pocket and presented it to her. "Happy Anniversary, love."

Ember accepted the box, already guessing that it was some sort of jewelry. It had to be. It's so cliché that it would fit Danny's m.o. to a T. She unwrapped the gift and opened the box. She was right, but what exactly it was still made her gasp lightly in awe.

It was a necklace of somewhat-thick silver chain, centered with a custom-made emblem, somehow putting an emerald-colored Danny Phantom insignia together next to her own insignia, which was turquoise, all on top of a heart-shaped piece of silver.

"Danny…! Is… Is all this real?" she asked. Again, she wondered if his friends covered financial expenses, like with the New Year's concert. If so, how the hell was he paying them back?

"The silver and the jewels? Yeah. It took some research and quite a bit of time for a jeweler to get it just right without messing up something so precise, but they're real alright. Solid too. Had to have a decent-sized chain in case you happen to have it on while crime-fighting… I hope you like it."

Ember's first response was to take the necklace out of the case and throw the case at Danny, which bopped him in the face. "Ow!"

"That was for unoriginality, Baby-Pop." she giggled. "You know how this goes. But I do love it… Thank you so much…Danny." The teenage superhero would never forget how she said his name at that moment, with so much joy in her eyes… That girl certainly had a way with her voice. But what else did he expect from a singer?

"Umm, Mr. Fenton?" a waiter had come up to them, carrying some sort of package.

"Yes?" he said, wondering if this package was Ember's anniversary gift. Judging from the loving look she was giving him, it just might be. Either that or she was still thrilled with her new necklace…

"This just arrived for you, sir. I must say, some of these delivery people are quite strange nowadays…" the waiter remarked as he handed the box to the raven-haired boy. Danny took it and placed it on his lap. "Wow, Ember. Wonder what's in your gift." he said as he began tearing the tape off the box top.

Ember then frowned. "That? Oh, no. That's not my gift…" Danny's hands stopped just as he was starting to lift one of the box flaps.

"Really? Who sent this, then?"

Just as he said that, something pushed through the top of the box and smashed Danny right in the face, blinding him. Ember shrieked. An uncomfortably cold sensation chilled his face and slowly crawled down his front as his hands felt around his face, feeling some sort of light, pliable metal around it. "Oh my God, are you alright, Baby-Pop?!" she asked. Was it just Danny or did she seem a little amused?

He felt around more, eventually finding the ends of whatever covered his face and pulled it off. He was still blind by whatever slimy material was in there. He gasped for breath…and some of the substance fell into his mouth. Lemon-meringue… He had been hit with a pie from a spring-loaded box! Ember couldn't help but laugh, her lover looking ridiculous with white whipped cream, lemon-yellow pie filling, and pie crust oozing all over his face and down his front.

"A pie jack-in-the-box! Wow! That's a new twist on an old comedy gag. Sorry, Baby-Pop, but it's just funny!" she giggled. Danny swiped off the majority of the pie with his hands, carelessly letting the globs of used pie hit the floor (much to the still-present waiter's chagrin). He grumbled as he started using some napkins to wipe off the rest of it.

"Yeah, real funny… Who the hell would prank me now of all times?" Danny groaned. He wanted this anniversary date to go without a hitch. But he should've known that some dose of Murphy's Law would eventually apply. Has there been any superhero that actually had one successful meaningful date with his/her true love without some sort of shenanigans? Well, maybe "off-panel" in the comic-verse…

Still snickering, Ember grabbed the package and looked it over, seeing if there's any indication of who could've done this. The wild rock-n-roller knew that most pranksters can't go without letting their targets know just who had defeated them. Looking inside, she had found something alright.

"Unfortunately, this won't be the only incident, Dipstick…" she said cryptically as she passed the box over, gesturing that he should look inside. The teenage superhero, flecks of pie still clinging to him here and there, took a look. It didn't seem like much to look at, aside from the sizable spring and the mechanism used to unleash the spring upon the box being opened. However, he did notice what Ember was talking about. A message written in red ink along the inside of one of the box top flaps…

"_A 'Taste' of things to come…_"

Danny couldn't help but roll his eyes. This potentially could be a problem if whoever sent this 'message' was planning anything particularly harmful. Unfortunately, with the kind of criminal assholes within his cabal of enemies and rivals, the threat of harm was indeed likely. For all he knew, the pie itself could have been poisoned.

Ember saw his dismissive eye roll. She had to turn this date around quick. It was supposed to be a good day, dammit. For the love of rock and roll, she didn't even steal anything today! No way was she going to let some sophomore prank ruin her anniversary.

The rest of the dinner finished without incident and Danny seemed to have cheered up again, despite still being a little apprehensive about the mystery of the pie prank. At first, they were heading toward a movie theater to go with the admittedly-cliché 'dinner and a movie' motif. However, the two couldn't decide on a movie. Ember had wanted to check out the new Ninja Turtles, but ended up getting a long-winded explanation about the "world's worst director" and lots of scenes containing explosions…

Not sure what movie to choose for the night, Ember suddenly had an idea. She grabbed her halfa by his hand and flew off, Danny protested in shock but soon went with it. After all, anything would be better than just mulling over movie choices. Ember soon led him to a quite secluded part of town, a small group of warehouses that weren't particularly heavily guarded. Danny noticed that his fiery lover had a familiar mischievous smirk on her face.

"Ember? What're you planning?" Danny cautiously asked. He definitely wasn't worried about himself, but he knew that smirk usually led to trouble when she was in a good mood for it.

"Oh, this? Not much, really… Just you and me, all alone, together… Almost like we're the only two people in the world…" she said, pretending to be in awe of the situation as she drew closer and closer to her Phantom. "Well, the only two that matter at the moment, anyway… As for the choice of scenery, well… I have gone to a rave or two back in my living days. Those always took place in areas like these and I had fun. Never actually hooked up with anyone at any of them, though… So I thought…" she trailed off, her cheeks slowly glowing a light red. Danny's eyes widened a bit.

"You have a… "doing it at a warehouse" fantasy?" he asked. He couldn't believe how stupid he sounded by asking that, but even Ember couldn't blame him. Warehouses weren't exactly the most romantic of settings…

"I guess so. I just thought we'd pick a warehouse, set my guitar to auto-play something low like there's party music in the distance to make it seem like we snuck away for some alone time during a rave, and just do it." Ember had to admit that her idea sounded a lot stranger when it was said aloud. Danny scratched his head, as if unsure. But he was thinking about it.

"Wow… Wasn't expecting this plan. I would've brought… umm…."

"Protection? Hello, I'm a ghost. Besides, if it somehow happened because of your halfa genes, I gotta tell ya… I certainly wouldn't mind." Ember said as matter-of-factly as possible. Ember McLain, always the epitome of 'Screw Consequences'… Danny wondered if Ember would've become a young mother if she hadn't had her unfortunate turn of events in life.

"Sigh… Well, I don't see how bad this could be. I'll go with it. If some guard overhears, we'll just shut up and go invisible." Danny said, reasoning it aloud. Ember grinned.

"There you go, Baby-Pop! Now you're starting to think my way. Damn, that's sexy when you do that." she purred, putting her arms around him and starting things with a quick kiss on the lips. Danny smiled, his hands landing on the small of her back as he returned the embrace.

"Glad to know that, my flame. But we got to pick a warehouse first." the halfa said as he floated upward, Ember hovering with him in his arms. "Let's see… Well, let's pick the closest one, since we're right in front of it." With that, he phased through the nearest wall. Ember chuckled lightly at the very elementary logic.

"Careful about choosing what's readily available." quipped the diva, her mind imagining several wacky scenarios. Unfortunately, she would never had guessed how right her warning turned out to be…

The warehouse in question seemed to be adequate for Ember's little scenario, even if the warehouse was packed with piles and piles of boxes and crates of every sort. The light number of guards that usually patrolled this place indicated that the boxes definitely didn't contain any rare treasures or anything of that sort. Even so…

"So what, do we just find some storage closet or perhaps some sort of office?" Danny asked. It was Ember's fantasy, after all. Who was he to immediately know all the specifics of such a unique idea?

"That sounds good. Gives the impression that we're hiding from other ravers. Let's look for an office!" she practically chirped. Danny could tell she was excited. Ember didn't 'chirp', after all. Although there was that one time that Danny playfully teased her by referring to her as 'his precious songbird'… That earned him a good glue-and-feathering as payback! Mostly for being too sappy, of course.

The two started hovering about, tending to stay close to the walls to look for a telltale doorway that might lead them to some sort of office. However, the search didn't last too long before both started hearing noises. It sounded like rustling and… was that groaning? The duo wasn't sure. Turning invisible in case of guards or anybody unwanted, they floated toward the source of the noises, weaving in and out of the piles of boxes.

'Hmm… If I didn't know any better, I'd say this would be a perfect hideaway for—' Danny's thoughts were immediately cut off when he turned a corner and the worst sight imaginable was instantly ingrained into both of their brains…

The Box Ghost seemed to be a bit busy with some "pie", provided by the Lunch Lady…

Before Ember could scream out her immediate disgust (as Danny knew she would), he grabbed her and flew straight away, phasing them through the nearest wall, stopping when they got outside. As Danny's feet hit the ground, so did his impending vomit as his dinner was forcibly evacuated from the sheer brutality of how wrong that scene is. Nothing shuts down a libido faster than seeing two not-so-attractive beings explore each other…

"Holy beef curtains, Batman! That has got to be the second worst thing I've ever seen in my afterlife! Dammit, couldn't those two stay in the Ghost Zone for that?! God, I need to bleach my brain…" Ember moaned, taking a nearby metal trash can lid and proceeding to smack herself on the head repeatedly with it, desperate to forget the last 30 seconds.

"Ugh! Please, babe, do NOT say 'beef curtains' ever again…" Danny said, his face going green again from remembering Lunch Lady's penchant for meat-based weaponry… He didn't want to ever imagine how she would interpret that particular innuendo. "Second worst? What was the first?" Danny couldn't help but ask, his stomach lurching once again. What could be worse than the living piece of hell-scape they just witnessed?

Ember stopped her barrage and gave him a challenging look. "You sure you want to find out, Dipstick? It took 10 whole bottles of hard liquor in one sitting to help me get over that. Just a warning." With that, she gave him a blow to the head with the trash can lid to 'help him forget'.

"Ow! Alright, forget I asked…" grumbled the halfa, rubbing his head as he spat out the last of the bile and vomit that lingered in his mouth. He was going to need mouthwash or at least a drink of water if Ember hoped for her little fantasy to continue…

After a few moments, Danny felt well enough to stand back up. He immediately yanked the bent and battered trash can lid from his love and tossed it away. "That's enough, flame. Hitting yourself isn't the answer."

"Actually, it is. I feel a bit better now. I can hardly think about that thing back there with this awful migraine I got." Ember said in a dazed tone. Danny groaned. Was this really going to be one of those nights? He focused some of his cryo-power into his right hand and lightly pressed it on Ember's forehead, earning a feminine "Ow, that's cold!" from her. He hoped that his makeshift 'ice pack' would help end her headache sooner.

"Thanks, Dipstick…" she mumbled, closing her eyes. What an evening this was turning out to be. Who knows how long it would be before their minds recovered enough to regain the romantic mood. She put her negative thoughts aside and just focused on the nice feeling of Danny's chilled hand on her forehead. Rest, relaxation, and remembering that things could only get better from here. The three 'R's she needed right now.

"You alright, Em?" he softly asked. Ember simply nodded, her ache indeed going away. Next time she decided to use a trash can lid, she was definitely not using it on herself.

"Good. I'd kiss you right now, but… well… my breath probably reeks right now" he explained, feeling put off. It seemed Ember misjudged the recovery time of Danny's lust. But then again, he is male... There was that rumor she heard about guys thinking about sex 'every 7 seconds' or something. She wasn't surprised to find some truth to that, if not an exact truth.

"Yeah, who'd want to kiss you now, barf-breath?" Ember joked, trying to lighten the overall mood. Danny pouted, crossing his arms in a silent challenge as if daring her to keep taunting. Ember turned and started floating away. "Let's just look in another warehouse. Hopefully, somebody left some mouthwash lying around. Otherwise, you're gargling some water." she explained before phasing through the nearby wall of the warehouse next to the one they hastily exited from.

Danny had to admire how stubborn she was. A piece of bad luck and bad timing like that and she still wants to indulge her fantasy on their anniversary. He had to believe that a lot of lovers would just call it a night after seeing something like that. Hell, a small part of him wouldn't have minded a rain-check based on the idea that the incident might spoil the mood or perhaps be forever part of the memory of the whole attempt. But he was no perfectionist, after all. And he was horny, no doubt about that.

The halfa phased through the spot where his lover phased through only to bump right into a floating Ember right as he came out the other side. It was made more embarrassing by the fact that when he made contact with her, he had went face first right into Ember's ass. What a seemingly klutzy scenario!

"Oof! Baby-Pop! Problem now, ass-worship later!" Ember said, blushing red as a rose.

"Phantom's here too? Wow, that's cool." Danny heard a new feminine voice exclaim in an amused tone. A familiar one, although he couldn't place where. Dislodging himself from Ember's firm-yet-soft backside, he straightened himself out and looked at what had Ember's attention.

Apparently, this warehouse district was a popular ghostly hangout, at least it was on this particular night. In front of the couple was Johnny 13 and his ever-present girlfriend, Kitty. Johnny's motorcycle was parked nearby and it was quite evident that the two were only starting to get intimate. Johnny smirked at his old rival.

"Bad luck, Danny boy?" the biker chortled, not bothering with the modest action of removing his hands from Kitty's ample chest.

"Well, at least this isn't like the last warehouse…" the hero muttered, hoping he didn't have a fight on his hands right now of all times.

"Dare I ask?" Kitty asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Box Ghost and Lunch Lady." At Ember's curt reply, all four ghosts shuddered.

"Don't tell me you actually…?" Johnny's question trailed off in obvious discomfort.

"We saw… We saw everything…" Danny said, his stomach turning on him lightly as if bothered by the mere mention of it.

"Holy shit, dude… Not even my powers can cause that kind of bad luck. Man, I'm sorry." Johnny said, knowing how ugly the two spirits in question were. He may have a gruff attitude toward things, but he wouldn't wish that on anybody. Well, except maybe Fright Knight.

Kitty squirmed her way out from under Johnny and went to Ember, pulling her into a tight hug, forgetting the fact that she was currently topless. "I can't believe you had to see such a thing! I remember accidentally walking in on my parents when I was alive… I couldn't eat for a couple of days after that."

'Kitty…! Air!"

Kitty looked down to find that her best friend's face had gotten smothered in her bare chest. She blushed and let her go. "Oops! Sorry, Ember…" Kitty said, chuckling. Ember's hair flickered and grew in annoyance.

"Whatever, Kitty…" the diva merely sighed passively.

"So, you two looking to get cozy with each other?" the green-haired girl asked. Danny blushed while Ember nodded.

"Trying to. It's our anniversary today." Ember replied, not feeling talkative but not wanting to disrespect her friend either.

Kitty squealed. "Oh, how romantic! One year, right? Gosh, it seems like only a couple of months ago when you told me that you defected to Team Phantom."

"You make it sound like a war's going on. Defected? Come on, Kitty… I just simply got a better boyfriend…" Ember said, knowing the start to some 'girl talk' when she hears it. How much longer did the two have until midnight? At this rate, lovemaking would have to be postponed… Or at least, a late-late-late night activity where they could still say that they did it during their anniversary date out.

"Are you nuts? It kinda is a war. Danny has you and his allies and on the other side, we got assholes like Walker and SkulkTech and Undergrowth and Spectra and all of them." Kitty replied, as if that explained everything.

"And you two?" Ember countered, smirking. An occasional bone of contention between Ember and Kitty since Ember's relationship started was which "side of the law" that Kitty and Johnny fell on.

Kitty's smirk vanished. "I told you, we just do our own thing. Neutral. We haven't done anything to Amity since the Disasteroid incident. We just hang around town and do crap like this." Kitty put her hands on her hips.

"What? Getting laid all day? Must be nice." Ember grinned, giggling. Kitty's arms dropped, slumping in astonishment as she realized that she had walked right into that snappy remark. Then, she grinned right back and both women shared a hearty laugh about it.

Danny and Johnny both felt like only spectators to what's going on, as both ladies seemed to have taken over the whole conversation. The halfa was at least glad that Johnny wasn't exactly in a fighting mood. His sentient shadow was always a formidable force to deal with. As for Johnny, he's relieved that the pesky hero was actually giving him some leeway, now that he was dating Kitty's best friend. Then again, not causing general havoc also seemed to keep Danny off of his case.

Kitty smirked at Ember, as if having a sudden thought. "So… you're looking for a place to get down and we're just getting down ourselves… Hmm… Wanna join in?"

Both Ember and Danny's eyes popped wide open. Even Johnny raised his eyebrows. "Uhh… Did you just suggest a foursome?" his voice sounded as if he was struck dumb. Sure, Kitty probably knew how attractive she was and she did live on the wild biker mentality, but… was she really that wild?

The biker girl floated over toward them. "Well, I was thinking that you two could go at it here in this room with us. This area's pretty spacious. Besides, it's just us four here and it's not like any of us have things we haven't seen before. But if you DO want a foursome, I probably wouldn't object. Your 'baby-pop' is pretty hunky, Ember." Kitty purred seductively, cupping Danny's chin with her hand and staring into his (still quite wide) eyes, giggling at how red his face is.

"What? Hey? What're you thinking, Kitty?" Johnny asked, seemingly thrown off by his girlfriend's sudden flirting. She had never done that before unless it was directed toward him.

"Just thinking of something new, baby. Nothing wrong with experimenting, right? Besides, remember those times you flirted with other chicks?" Kitty said, her gaze toward Johnny suddenly turning sharp. Johnny remembered alright. "Well, if they accept, you can get that out of your system with Ember if you'd like."

"Uhh, Kitty? I like you guys, but… a foursome?" Ember asked, also floored. Was this one of those tests from God that she heard about? All her talk about being a wild woman and a rebellious rock star (not to mention, her typical brash behavior) and she's suddenly has a situation thrown at her that makes her 'put her money where her mouth was'? She was a musician, not a whore! Parties, booze, and rocking out, right? Then again, didn't a lot of rockers fool around with groupies? In the span of 5 seconds, she seemed to consider it as a major fork in the road of afterlife. Does she indulge her wild side and have a fling with her boyfriend, her best friend, and another man? Or does she prefer remaining exclusive to just her Baby-Pop, appearing to 'mellow out' in the face of kinky ideas?

Danny answered before Ember could. "Umm… Well, I guess we'll see what happens…" he shyly said, the biker girl playfully pinching one of his cheeks while he was barely able to keep from staring at her breasts. Ember's head snapped toward him, surprised. Did her 'little boy scout' actually just consider their scandalous offer? "Danny?" she asked, not realizing that she used his name.

"Well… You always wanted me to 'liven up my act a little', right?" Danny said, remembering the few times she joked at him about his goody-goody tendencies. His reply struck Ember's train of thought like a thunderbolt. He was considering it… for her? But why? He didn't need her approval. She was already his. Was she actually influencing him? She needn't have asked that one. She knew some things were different now than at the beginning of their time together, like the fact that he let her keep her stolen goods whenever she went on the prowl for music stuff.

For the first time ever, Ember McLain wondered the question 'How wild is too wild?'…

Kitty placed both hands on the sides of Danny's head and slowly pulled his head in. Danny gulped, guessing what was coming. Was he really up to this? Making out with another woman, right in front of Ember? It was his own fault for pretty much agreeing to Kitty's idea, even if he said it in a roundabout way. Kitty's lips came closer to his own, then…. went to his ear?

"By the way… Gotcha!" she said, before quickly floating away, laughing. The three others gaped, not sure what to make of this at all. Danny felt left hanging, immediately followed by guilt for briefly wanting Kitty. Johnny grew annoyed as his girlfriend kept laughing. Ember realized that Kitty was pulling a big joke and, as standard Ember protocol dictated, promptly got furious.

"What the blue hell was THAT, Katherine?!" Ember growled, flying over and grabbing Kitty by the shoulders, spinning her around to make her face him. Kitty stopped laughing, for there were only a handful of times that Ember resorted to using her old living name. All of those times were when Kitty had pushed her too far.

"Ember? Come on, surely you could tell that I was kidding with you two. I mean, even though Phantom's turned out to be quite a stud, you know I wouldn't steal your man, especially after all you told me about you two…" the topless Kitty said calmly, hoping that her logic would ring true in Ember's mind. Throughout their friendship, Kitty was indeed one to pull a practical joke here and there when the mood struck her, as witnessed by Ember. The rocker should've known better too, since Kitty was also one for loyalty in relationships, having had to put up with a lot from her biker boyfriend who tended to have roaming eyes when other women were around, seemingly like instinct. During their occasional girl-talks, Kitty had never really said much about 'demanding loyalty' or 'specifically wanting commitment', but Ember could tell it was there. She really should have known… Nonetheless, she still glared at her.

"That… wasn't funny." Ember replied, fists clenched. Kitty backed up a little. Perhaps she had gone too far this time? Ember's hair flickered a little more violently. "You think it's cute, suggesting an orgy like it's no big deal?"

"Well, Johnny-boy had it coming anyway. If he thinks he can just gawk at any woman that floats on by, why can't I do the same to show him what it's like?" Kitty countered. Ember paused. She did have a point there. The rocker lost count of how many times she felt the bad-luck-powered biker's eyes on her body during the times she visited Kitty's realm. Then again, that was partially her own fault since she stubbornly preferred her usual form-fitting attire of a tank-top and tight pants… Ember sighed. She couldn't punish her friend for that reason. She still wanted to, though. Maybe later… 'Yes' her mind decided. 'You'll get yours some other time… Katherine…'

Johnny simply looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "Wha? Baby, come on. I haven't looked at another woman for a couple of months now. I'm getting better, I swear!"

Ember smirked. She knew one way to vent after being pranked the way she did… "That's not what Desiree told me… And Spectra… And that hot waitress ghost down at the Diner… And that clique of high-school girls… Not to mention, that lesbian ghost that haunts that porn store somewhere in Amity's slums."

Danny raised an eyebrow. "Really? There's a ghost there? I always thought somebody was always getting lucky every night."

Ember glanced at him. "And how would you know that?" A suspicious look appeared on her face, her eyes seemingly amused. Maybe she was indeed influencing her noble hero… Perhaps he has a little stash of 'viewing material' hidden away? Perhaps be bought a 'toy' to try out on her sometime?

"Late night patrol. Every time I check that area of the slums, I'm always hearing these loud moans. Sounded sexual, though. So who am I to judge? Right?" Ember's amusement fell. Of course. A logical innocent explanation, since she could attest to hearing how loud those moans where late at night, having perused the area once or twice before at night… That girl never knew when to shut up!

"Ah, whatever. Anyways, you're busted, Johnny." Ember said, turning her mischief back on the poor biker. Johnny squirmed where he stood, suddenly feeling quite uncomfortable. To his credit, he had been trying to stop being such a perv around other women. But, ghostly instincts being what they were sometimes, it was a hard thing to do, seeing as it was a part of his personality when he was alive, sort of like Ember's need of music. Didn't Kitty understand? She's a ghost too…

"Danny's loyal, Johnny. I could tell when I was right in his face, the way he fought so hard not to blatantly stare at my tits. Oh, he looked. Naturally. But he knows his place." Kitty simply explained. "Learn something from that and we'll be fine."

"But you just said that he looked, 'naturally'. That's what I just do! I just look! It's instinct, just like you said." Johnny countered, stupidly not realizing that she wasn't yelling at him (like she tended to do when she caught him sometimes).

"Men look, boys stare!" Kitty snapped back. "Now are we clear? Or are the four of us going to have to just go our own way for tonight?"

Johnny slumped. "Alright! I got it. Lesson learned. So…" he then sighed. "Where were we?"

Ember grabbed Danny by the wrist and started floating toward a wall. "We were just leaving. This got too weird. I really wasn't expecting to help teach Johnny a lesson." She said, mockingly ending her statement by sticking her nose up in the air in an indignant huff, like a rich person being dismissive of someone lower class. Danny just shrugged as he passed by the bikers. Yeah, Kitty shouldn't have done that, but he was sure Ember would eventually forgive the green-haired girl. Maybe. After a few months, at least.

Outside the warehouse, Ember slumped against a wall, feeling worn out. Kitty may have just been joking around (although she was quite convincing), but Ember didn't like how easily such a suggestion played with her mind and made her practically reexamine her afterlife. Perhaps some soul-searching would be appropriate, as ironic as that sounds.

"Baby-Pop?" Ember asked. Danny, who leaned against the wall next to her, softly grunted in acknowledgement, seemingly in thought himself. "What would you say to calling it a night tonight? We had a great anniversary and I'm certain we won't forget tonight after the 'fun' encounters. But I'm just not feeling it anymore tonight…"

Danny sighed. He had a feeling that the joke threw a wrench in their plans. "Yeah, it's alright. It's not like we had a sucky anniversary."

"Nah, this was good, trust me." she replied, leaning her head back until the back of her head meets the wall, gazing up at the evening sky. A moment of silence passed between the lovers, neither one exactly wanting to part ways just yet. Then, Danny chuckled to himself.

"What now?" Ember asked, having had enough of jokes. Danny put an arm around her.

"It's just kinda funny. We run into Box Ghost and Lunch Lady and you're still up for doing it, but one gag from Kitty and the mood's ruined. How crazy is that?"

Her face scrunched up in annoyance. "Don't push it, Dipstick…"

"I'm not. I just thought it was amusing. Are you alright, Em?" Danny started to wonder if there was more to this than just Kitty's prank being successful.

"Yeah, I'm ok…"

"You sure?" Danny's question made Ember turn her head toward him, supposedly to glare at him for being pushy. However, when her eyes met his, she knew that he was being pushy because he cared. His glowing green eyes were full of concern with a hint of affection. At least, she believed it was that. She wasn't an expert at reading people. That kind of thing was more for people like Danny's shrink-wannabe sister. However, she has had good luck getting a decent read on Danny's expressions, having been with him for so long.

She sighed. "No… It's just…. Well… Do you think I'm wild?" she asked, her voice softening in shy embarrassment.

"Huh?"

"Am I wild? Like I'm always talking about…?" Her mouth couldn't help but pout. Danny gently pulled her in close so she was leaning against him.

"What are you talking about? Of course you are. You're loud, you're blunt, you do unexpected things, you kick random criminal ass right before turning around and stealing things anyway, you go out of your way to let me know the hard way when you're horny... I'd say you're far from tame." Danny said in what he hoped was a reassuring tone.

"Thanks, Dipstick… It's just that… when Kitty invited us to a foursome, I… I was torn. A part of me was interested, but…another part of me wanted to just punch her out and take you away. But… doesn't that mean I'm… mellowing out? All the crazy rock stars tend to have plenty of random sex and I remember a couple of flings I had when I was alive… but now, I'm suddenly thinking this and… Dammit, I'm wussing out…" Ember finished with a whimper, feeling dumber as she kept talking. Danny's grip on her tightened slightly, the halfa trying to be as comforting as possible.

"Ember, I don't think you're 'wussing out'. Far from it. Personally, it sounds like you're just… hmm… developing your personality, I think?" he questioned in an uncertain tone. "Hmm, sounds about right? Jazz would probably have some brainer way of saying it. Anyways, I doubt it's a problem. I mean, maybe you're changing because of the good thing we have going here. Have you had a relationship that lasted this long?"

"Hmm… No… There was one… when I was alive, but… well… things happened. You wanna know the details, you can figure it out from my main jam… You know, 'Remember'?" Ember said, her tone hardening as she said the last part, driving home the point that she didn't feel like discussing specifics yet.

"And… Did you always like the idea of being in a relationship?" he asked.

"…Yeah, guess so. Nothing wrong with a girl being pampered by some hunk, right?" she couldn't resist adding in a small smirk, her humor ever-so-present.

"Hah… I wouldn't know, babe. I don't swing that way." Danny countered, showing a smirk of his own.

"That's not what some people on the internet would say." she snickered, remembering some of the crazier stuff she had seen on some of the Danny Phantom "Phan Sites". Some people could really draw. If only they could use their fan-art talents for something other than putting her boyfriend in situations reminiscent of gay porn videos… And of course, that was nothing compared to some of the fan-fiction some of the Amity Park locals have posted. She would be lying if she said that she didn't get a little turned on from some of them…

Danny facepalmed, blushing. "Emberrrr…" he groaned. The diva laughed, playfully poking Danny's shoulder as he kept his face buried in the palm of his hand. The things some fans come up with… He just couldn't understand why some fans like creating stuff like that. In any case, the halfa was relieved that she seemed to be cheering up…but why did it always have to be at his own expense? Ah well, as long as it helps…

"Dammit… Well, anyway…" he said, trying to change the subject. "Perhaps a part of you feels like you don't need to be as… umm… sexually open? I think that's the right phrase… I should've listened more to Jazz's psycho-babble…. Sigh… But yeah, don't need to be as 'sexually open' because you finally have what you wanted: a relationship that actually seems to be working. I mean, look, one year!" he said, clearly stumbling through that explanation. No wonder Ember smacked him around for using unoriginal references. Not everyone was a natural wordsmith…

Ember looked thoughtful as she mulled over his words. He did have a point. Perhaps she was adapting to the idea that she's now in a seemingly-stable relationship, the first one she ever had that actually lasted an entire year. Nothing wrong with wanting to have a regular, exclusive relationship. She could still 'bring the noise' in other ways.

"Sounds logical… even for you." she said, lightly slapping him upside the head. Danny flinched, but grinned. Ember smiled that rarely-used sincere smile. He may be a dork sometimes, but he was HER dork. Her smile faltered as she just realized that she had just thought an unoriginal cliché line. Dammit, he was rubbing off on her!

"Glad you feel better, Ember. I'd hate for this date to end on a sour note." Danny said, leaning in for a kiss which she gladly gave him. The first one was a nice, quick kiss. Rare from Ember… Usually, she starts off soft when she's feeling particularly grateful for something.

"Well, as usual, you had to go and be 'the big hero'. I feel so 'saved'. Thank you." she said, jabbing at his 'day job'. With that, she practically latched her lips to his in her usual flare for passionate making out. Danny fell over as Ember leaned into him, soon finding himself beneath Ember as she practically wrestled his tongue with hers. Perhaps she would get some sort of satisfaction of her "rave party warehouse" fantasy after all, even if they didn't take it all the way. Perhaps another night, they would try again…

If they did decide to try it again some other night, both of them hoped that the warehouses would be less 'populated' next time… Then again, it was a new year for the lovers, so to speak. After all, anything could happen.

Even particularly corny happy endings.

"Ow!" Danny cried as Ember had pinched his ass mid-kiss. "What was that for?"

"You were thinking something cliché, weren't you?" Ember said, smirking down at him. Danny became very turned on by the sight of Ember on her hands and knees right above him with that troublesome smirk on her face.

"I… um… No." Danny said. When caught off-guard, he was a terrible liar. Not that he was an expert at it when he had time to prepare a lie either…

"You so were. Besides, I bet you liked me pinching you there. Don't you?" she said, her voice taking on a sultry vibe, leaning down as her hand reached under him and roamed down his back again. Danny couldn't help but smile stupidly. Yeah, she was 'pressing his buttons' alright.

Needless to say, the anniversary went out with a 'bang' after all…

Author's Note: Holy crap! I think this is the longest story in Comical Relations yet. I mean, I thought it was going to be just a couple of antics and boom, done. But idea after idea after idea kept coming as I kept writing this and this is the result. Hopefully, this patchwork story of a bundle of ideas is good, not some sort of weird literary Frankenstein that people would want to torch and pitchfork.

On a side note about a certain joke toward the end there: I mean absolutely NO offense to those that prefer to draw/write fan-things that are slash/yaoi/homosexual. I don't mind what people tend to write or draw. It goes to people's preference, really. I'm no censor. I hate censorship. I just thought that a good joke here would be how a superhero character (or any other type of character that would be well-known in his town/country/planet) that is definitively straight might react to the existence of homosexual fanart/fanfiction that features him. Sort of a Deadpool-esque "breaking the 4th wall" gag without using Deadpool's insanity. I would imagine that a current-day superhero's girlfriend might rib him on it at least once at some point in the relationship (with notable exceptions such as Batman (Catwoman knows better!) and perhaps Aquaman and Green Lantern (Does Atlantis and Space have internet? Lol.)). So I do hope that nobody takes the joke the wrong way.

I will keep my Poll up, perhaps with a new option included to vote on. So please vote! I'd like to see what you would like to see happen, not having done this Poll thing before for a story. Good thing somebody let me know about that whole "put the Poll on the Profile" option. As always, please review! Review and vote! Thank you in advance.


	7. The Goth Heard Around The World

Author's Note: Alright, alright. I got a split decision here about this fic and would appreciate some feedback from you guys. On one hand, one of you guys left me a review with a great idea and I really like it and would like to try typing it out. On the other hand, the current lead choice in my Poll demands satisfaction (despite the fact that not a lot of people elected to vote in my Poll… Which leads me to ask: Do you have to be a fairly-prolific or popular fanfic writer on to get people to do things like polls?) I mean, I'm a man of my word. I say voter's choice, I should go with voter's choice.

Long story short, here's what it's come down to: A) Danny and Ember celebrate Halloween in a kinky way (Credit for the idea goes to "DannyPhantom619") or B) Danny tells Ember of the downfall of the Danny/Sam relationship (leading my little Poll with a mere 2 votes).

After some deliberation, I'm going to do the Poll winner first, followed by the Halloween idea. Perhaps by the time I get done with the Halloween one, it'll actually be relatively timely! :insert canned laughter here:

Disclaimer: I seriously still have to do this thing? Everybody already knows anyway…

Part 8: The Goth Heard Around The World

Ember McLain was not very good at reading people just from facial expressions. No, her visual observational specialty lay in reading sheet music and carefully watching musicians in action when playing instruments. After all, technique is important. It also didn't hurt that she also had a keen eye for knowing where to find rare items of her particular interests quite easily whenever she was on the prowl. However, she ended up beginning to learn to read people's expressions better almost unwittingly, thanks to her one-year-old relationship with Danny.

That didn't mean she knew how to read everyone better, though. Everybody is different in their own way, of course. Such was the case for the present time, a nice and sunny Sunday afternoon, when she was spending time with Danny and Sam. The trio had agreed to a day out on the town, mostly out of boredom. Tucker and Valerie had a date that involved mayoral duties, specifically the opening day of a new Chinese restaurant that only served meat-centric meals. (The rest of Team Phantom had a sneaking suspicion that Tucker himself funded the restaurant to promote his "pro-meat" beliefs, much to Sam's growing anger.)

First, they started with a movie. It started off well enough, the trio easily agreeing on watching "Guardians of the Galaxy" and managing to get good seats in a relatively populated theater. However, as Ember randomly picked her moments to passively flirt with Danny throughout the movie (lightly touching him, leaning into him, intentionally reaching for popcorn at the same time he did so their hands met, etc), she couldn't help but notice something about Sam. She couldn't put a finger on what it was. Probably due to how dim it was in the theater. But she knew she recognized…something about the Goth's expression. It wasn't jealousy, for sure. She had seen enough of that particular emotion to know it anywhere, thanks to Kitty. Still, her mind couldn't help but note it.

Their next activity was something different for most Team Phantom members. Sam had thought it'd be fun to try the miniature golf course. Danny agreed, saying some remark about the weather being good enough to do it. Ember just shrugged and went with them. Of course, mini golf wasn't exactly the most exciting thing for a woman of her caliber of all things "metal". However, Ember would admit that she needed to do something relatively relaxing. Crime fighting had been on the upswing lately…

This had also proven to be an opportunity for the resident ghostly couple to flirt a bit. Ember, who insisted on using her guitar as a golf club, was never one for hitting anything lightly. She had proven this by overshooting the first hole, so much so that it had enough momentum to skip across the nearby large pond like a smooth, flat stone. Enhanced strength didn't seem to work for this game. So Danny, either being the gentleman or taking an opportunity, decided to teach her how to putt by getting up behind her, putting his arms around her. While his hands were over hers, he guided her swing by moving her arms slowly back and forth, demonstrating a light enough swing.

Ember immediately recognized what his "lesson" really was after feeling a certain something pressing against her backside, despite the clothing, and couldn't help but snicker at his goofy charm. The man could be such a dork sometimes. But as long as he was willing to show affection, she had no reason to complain, nor did she want any reason. However, she again couldn't help but notice the Goth girl that watched them nearby. In the brighter light, she again took note of the look on her face. She had seen that kind of expression before, she was sure if it now. She wondered if Danny's actions were making Sam feel like a 'third wheel'. She herself had felt like that a few times during her occasional hang-outs with Johnny 13 and Kitty whenever they started feeling enticed to sneak off. Perhaps that was Sam's expression? After a moment, her mind rejected that notion. For whatever reason, it didn't seem like a "feeling left out" type of look.

Her musings were cut off when Danny was forcibly knocked off of her. Immediately after, she heard familiar laughter.

"Hey, Happy Gilmore! Nice 'putting'!" guffawed the medieval dragon-prince, Aragon, who had spat a fireball at Danny in a surprise attack, even though he was still in human form. The three heroes glared at him. Then, Danny seemed to realize something.

"Wait a minute. How do you know about that movie anyway? Last I checked, you've been pretty stubborn about remaining in the middle ages."

"Well, that was the case, petulant lout. Until my simpering sister brought back one of your modern Earthly trinkets. I believe they calleth it 'The Net-flicks', whatever that means. Amusing things, these 'move-ees' are." Aragon explained, wearing a triumphant smirk for believing to have gotten one over on his nemesis. Never mind the fact that he still had a lot to learn about modern culture…like the fact that the 'trinket' that Dora brought to him was called a computer…

"Damn." Ember said, eyebrows raised. "That company's everywhere!"

"Tell me about it." Sam added.

"That aside, shall we duel, peasant?" Aragon challenged, his aura suddenly appearing.

Danny instantly shifted to his ghostly persona. "To respond to your little reference: You're gonna die, clown!"

Danny would have said that the battle that commenced made him feel like he was actually in the Skyrim video game, if not for the fact that the game's character couldn't fly. Needless to say, flight made things slightly easier. Well, that and ecto-beams. So, in the long run, it was totally different from Skyrim, except for how tough the dragon itself is. Fighting a dragon is still fighting a dragon…

The smartest move on Danny's part was taking the fight to the skies immediately, something that the owners of the mini-golf course appreciated greatly (as well as everybody in the immediate vicinity). The second-smartest plan was to block whatever molten-fire breath he couldn't dodge with ice powers. Even though he had gotten stronger, Danny couldn't mount any major offensive due to Aragon's natural defense of dragon scales. Unfortunately, Ember couldn't do a lot either, as a dragon's roar seemed to be louder than a superpowered electric guitar, which wasn't good for sound-based attacks… That didn't mean Danny was out of options, though.

As the defensive battle continued, the halfa grew desperate. He had a random thought, one that he believed would be too clichéd-by-media to work. Some media tropes never get their facts checked, right? But at this point, he was willing to try anything. Hearing the telltale inhale of breath, he focused his cryogenic powers into his hands again and flew in toward Aragon's head.

The dragon opened its now-glowing mouth, the inferno waiting to be unleashed.

Danny immediately fired, silently praying that old chestnut about archers hoping that their aim is true.

The ice beam hit Aragon straight in his mouth and down his throat, freezing the inside of his mouth and nullifying the dragon's best weapon. Danny couldn't believe it. The cliché "impenetrable on the outside, weak on the inside" gag actually works! Who'd have thought it?

"Aaaaah! Brain freeze! It hurts!" roared Aragon, somewhat amazed he could still talk with a mostly-frozen mouth. The jaw hanging uselessly open, the dragon couldn't help but hack up chunks of ice, probably what remained of the fire breath he was prepared to unleash. "Shtarting to gohh numm!" he roared, the impending numbness starting to impair his speech.

It was at this point when Danny decided to mercifully suck the hulking royal beast up into a Fenton Thermos to cap the victory. Danny and Ember floated back down to where Sam was waiting, still within the lightly-damaged mini-golf course.

"Should I risk saying an ice-related pun? I feel like they've all been overused by now." Danny wondered aloud as he glanced around. The area had a wind-swept look due to Aragon's wings when he took off to fight, loose golf balls, used score sheets, and some food-related garbage scattered about. The token Windmill obstacle was blown right off the mill and was halfway sunk into the course's large pond. Talk about a water hazard…

"Your call, Danny. But if you're thinking of saying something lame like 'ice to see you', I'll give you a reason to have chills down your spine." Ember quipped, crossing her arms for emphasis. The couple couldn't help but notice Sam also crossing her arms, smirking in silent agreement with Ember.

"Fine, you two win. Wow, what a 'frosty' reception." the halfa was quick to answer, snickering away at the women's rolling eyes. Sam couldn't help but recall the time Danny was split in two and wondered if "Fun-Danny" had too much influence sometimes. Regardless, the trio decided to end their mini-golf expedition as the scattered debris from the attempted ambush sort of kills the mood.

As they journeyed back to Sam's mansion, Ember stayed close to Danny like always. As they walked and talked, Ember again noticed Sam looking at them in a certain way. Granted, she looked normal enough as the three conversed, but Ember saw it in her eyes. The same as the last two times she noticed. It finally occurred to her what it could possibly be. The feeling of being reminded of something precious having been lost and yet, still wanting it. No wonder Ember recognized it, despite her beginner level of reading people. She experienced that feeling herself before.

She knew from her previous time as a ghostly felon that there was something between Danny and Sam and had heard after the Disasteroid Incident that they had dated for some time. But what broke them up? Until now, she hadn't cared. Couples break up and make up all the damn time for plenty of reasons, as everyone knew. But now she was curious. She had heard of a few cases where couples mutually decide that it's not going to work and remain good friends. So why the sad longing?

Which was why, that evening, she decided to bring it up.

It was apparently game night at Ember's realm. The rock diva had to smirk at Danny's current gaming focus: Completing the Mass Effect Trilogy. She knew that a part of his interest in the venerable sci-fi epic had to do with his career interest in becoming an astronaut, since there was plenty of space exploration to go around throughout the three games. A part of her always wondered if he realized that, technically, he could just fly up to space whenever he wanted to, since ghosts didn't need to breathe. Vlad was proof that halfas could survive in zero-air environments.

As for the other elements of the game… Ember noted that perhaps she should cosplay as an Asari woman for Danny. Blue seemed to be her color anyway!

But that was beside the point…

"Hey, Danny… umm… You and Sam dated, right?"

"Yeah…?" Danny answered curiously, somewhat caught off-guard by her question.

"Not that I don't like where you and I are now, but… I'm kinda curious… What happened to you two anyway? Ya don't see a lot of mutual breakups, you know."

Danny paused the game. This was going to be a little while. "Sigh…"

"Danny?"

"Don't get me wrong, Em. I'm glad I have you by my side. But… I did love her. Part of me still does. I hope you know what I mean." Danny said, putting his controller down.

"I get you. A close bond, no matter what form it is…"

"Exactly. Well… We were happy. We thought it could last. However, there seemed to be a constant problem, a thorn in our side that wouldn't leave us alone. Eventually… hmm… let me explain…"

-Flashback: A couple of weeks after Phantom Planet, Danny's Narration/P.O.V.-

Things started off great. Really great. The comic writers certainly had it right about certain moments when a nemesis finally faces defeat and the hero feels on top of the world. Sam and I both felt like a million bucks together! Never mind the fact that Sam's bank account actually did hold more than a million bucks, but who's counting metaphors?

We'd always hang out after school. Sometimes we'd hit the arcade, other times I'd go with Sam to her Goth café called the Skulk and Lurk, and of course, there's always my duties as a hero. She'd be helpful as always with a last-ditch toss of a Fenton Thermos. Of course, nobody minded that. Sam, Tucker, and I would be away from home after school for a while often enough anyway.

It was the actual evening dates that drew certain objections.

Every time I picked her up… Every single freakin' time… I'd always get glares from her parents. Usually, I'd get glares like that from my parents when I'm in my ghost form, back before they knew it was me! But they'd just ignore me. At first.

Perhaps they had thought that Sam was just "going through a phase of pitying the uncivilized poor" or whatever high-class shit they'd spew. Ya know, hoping that Sam would just not want to be around me after a few weeks or something, since the "novelty" would have worn off. Well, that didn't happen. She and I were still pretty damn happy. So, of course, they started to 'step up'…

I admit, they played some decent strategy. Start off subtle, then work your way up. They couldn't do the restraining order crap again, since they'd already played that. Not to mention, with Tucker being the mayor, he wouldn't allow their crap to fly. Their first tactic was to angrily call my parents and harass them to get me to dump her. Boy, did that get me a strange talking-to. Mom was more annoyed than mad, though. But she still questioned me about what I've been doing with Sam just in case and that was awkward, not that Sam and I did anything we shouldn't have…

Eventually, it lead to Mom and Mrs. Manson getting into over-the-phone shouting matches. Sam wasn't too thrilled about that either. She felt so bad for my mom… I remember shortly after they stopped the phone calls, Sam bought my mom a very nice luxury bathrobe with her name on the back, you know, one of those fancy ones (since she didn't know what to get her that didn't involve ghost-hunting)…and she got my dad a big basket of fudge. Of course… (I see you rolling your eyes, Ember.) My parents would've never thought to blame her at all anyway. Ah well…

Next was Mr. Manson trying to intimidate me with "the talk". No, not the 'birds and bees' talk. No, no-no-no-no… I mean, the "I have a shotgun" talk. You know those graphic t-shirts that say shit like "I have a beautiful daughter, I also have a shotgun and an alibi"? Much more impactful when it's told to you in person by someone that completely hates you… I mean, if looks could kill… Well, I wouldn't even exist anymore, I'd be reduced to mere ashes!

It was almost amusing that his little 'warning' was almost-comically offset by his supposed 'casual-wear' of loafers, a thousand-dollar shirt, and wrinkle-free well-kept pants. I mean, the kinda things he was talking about, you'd expect somebody wearing what Johnny 13 usually wears. But whatever, I mostly tuned him out. I mean, what was he going to do? Hire a hitman? I'm already half-dead and even they knew that.

And so, he rambled on. Blah blah, dump my daughter, blah blah blah, she's too good for moneyless scum, blah blah blah, high class breeds high class, yak yak and so on. What was this, a talk with a potential suitor or a firing of a bad employee? I couldn't tell which! Ha.

I knew he knew that I knew that his little talk couldn't possibly work. As I thought, he didn't bother to hire a hitman. But he did try to perform another kind of assassination. Character assassination. You know that stereotype about how the rich control the media whenever they want to? Well, they certainly didn't fail to prove that true. Soon enough, all the local stations had to run Manson-made Anti-Phantom ads and PSA's claiming that I had "gotten lazy on crime fighting" and "had taken to using his hero status to get away with statutory rape".

I still remember some of the more ridiculous statements. "Did you know that Danny Phantom spends his free time by hovering inside girls' locker rooms?" Jeez, one time… It only happened one time! Ow! Ember, c'mon… Can you really blame me for that back then? It was back when my powers were still relatively new. What teenage boy wouldn't have the urge to use transparency and intangibility powers to sneak a peek? Anyways, thank God that Tucker became mayor. He 'fought money with money' by imposing fines on any station caught playing those ads. He managed to justify it by comparing the Mansons' actions to "yelling at firefighters that save your house from a fire because they got your remaining stuff wet".

There was some negative fallout, though. I remember a small band of protestors outside FentonWorks demanding that I become listed as a sex offender for the alleged voyeurism. Kinda funny how out of all the false allegations, the one that some take the bait on is the girls' locker room one. I mean, there was ones about pranking random civilians, stealing, instigating bar fights, bilking reward money out of people I rescue… People, huh? Good thing most of the city didn't believe the campaign. The Mansons wouldn't be the first 'nutjobs' to run ads on Amity's local channels.

Next up came the line of arranged boyfriends for Sam. Sticking to true stereotypical form, all the boys the Mansons brought to Sam were sons of successful business colleagues. Sam had an extremely short fuse that week. Mrs. Manson had a particularly snide sense of humor when she came over to my house and tried to set me up with some businessman's gay son, saying that he'd be 'more my taste' and that it's better to 'start at the bottom'. Double-puns so intended… ("That's gotta be the most anyone's ever gone out-of-the-way to call someone a homo, Baby-Pop." Ember quipped, unamused.) Tell me about it. She brought the guy with him and she said that crap in front of my parents and Jazz. Hoo boy, Mom blew a gasket at that one. I think Jazz said something about Mrs. Manson really needing some psychological help, something about "obsessive hate"… Eh, Jazz would know, since she's the psychiatrist here…

Sam stood her ground, though. She went as far as to start pranking the guys, usually some scare tactics. Most proved to scare easily. I mean, something like a life-size vampire doll on a giant spring coming out of a closet? Easy and flawed jump-scare prank, and yet, there they go. Others were kinda brave, but that's when she just treats them like dirt or goes all "super-Goth" depressing on them. Worked every time. I still get a kick out of seeing her super-Goth mode, with extra mascara on and her hair done in a deliberate dark fashion. Good times…

And so, that failed. A few nights after Sam scared off the final available guy, I went over to pick her up for a date, like usual. Boy, was that a mistake. I should've just had her come over… If there was a time when I needed Spider-Man's spider-sense to warn me of any type of danger, it'd have been then. I knock on the door, expecting Sam to answer. Suddenly, the door gets pulled right open and I barely dodge Mr. Manson's attack. The guy had a freaking metal baseball bat. A grown-ass man, attacking a teenager for no valid reason. The jerk was persistent, though. He kept swinging, I kept weaving in and out, up and down, back and forth.

Now I've had a ton of crap swung at me throughout my superhero gig, so it would seem like common sense that I could actually read and dodge incoming attacks with relative ease nowadays, especially attacks from average humans, seeing as ghosts like you tend to be just a bit faster. ("Damn straight, Dipstick!") Anyways, Mr. Manson didn't hit any homers, however… well… there came a boiling point where I ducked one swing and Mr. Manson ended up accidentally smashing in a window of his own personal limo. Hey, I still stand by my defense of 'he had it coming', because he did. Anybody would agree. But the scream this guy let out afterward…

It was definitely one of those frustrated, over-the-edge "What the hell do I have to do?! I can't figure this shit out!" kinda screams. That got the attention of a few nearby pedestrians, most likely the people inside the surrounding homes, and of course, Mrs. Manson and Sam who both came to the door to see what was up. Mr. Manson threw his bat in the air and just…. came at me. Dude was like a raving lunatic, throwing punches, kicks, he even tried scratching, biting. He even tried to go for my eyes. Made me wonder what the hell average-class people like my family ever did to him and his wife, cause this shit wasn't normal…

Soon, I found myself in a bit of a handicap as 'the missus' herself joined her husband by trying to swat me with a broom while repeatedly saying 'Shoo!' and 'Go away!'. That was… strange. I'm not a bug… Either way, I was chased all over the yard. No way was I leaving without my girlfriend. I couldn't hit back, of course. I mean, self-defense is one thing, but it's still Sam's parents… What would she have thought? Heh, turned out to be the same result in the long-run anyway…

Didn't stop me for poking a little fun at them, though. Ya know the old tricks… Sticking the tongue out, flipping them off, saying snarky comments like "that's all you got?", letting them think for a second that a punch would hit only for me to go intangible so the punch misses, that kinda stuff. Hell, they're obsessed with their hate, so what's the harm of egging them on a little?

Turns out, plenty of harm.

The 'old man' finally played smart. Feinted left when he was really going right… Well, right and a lot farther south… Ever see a rich snob bother to kick somebody in the crotch? No? Thinking that they'd have a butler do that for them or something? Well, let me tell you… it happened. Looked like he was going for a left hook, so I ducked. Saw a foot come up a little too late. Field goal right in the crotch. Damn, that hurt… Some of those fancy shoes must be made outta real solid material or something. Next thing I knew, while I was bent over, I got a knee to the face.

Worst nosebleed ever. So I'm on the ground, clutching my nose and thinking that it's broken. I heard Sam call my name but couldn't think much of it at the moment. I thought they were gonna curb stomp me but instead I see Mr. Manson join the ground next to me, knocked over.

I take a look around. Sam had shoved her father down. Probably would've been a punch to the face, but I suppose they are still her parents… Man, even I had never angered her as much as she looked right then. I think her rant went something like this…

"Look at yourselves! You turn this whole town upside-down with your phony ads and your business partners and now… Now you're two grown adults assaulting a teenage boy… For what?! Wanting to date me? I can't believe you two. Money is NOT everything! For the last…damn… time… I will NOT be some snob's trophy wife! I am my own woman and if I date somebody, it'll be someone that likes ME, not my money! If you two can't see that, I might as well move out and make a fresh start somewhere else, where you can't use me for building your damn 'empire' or whatever! Get some damn help or something! You two make me sick!"

It was about that time that the cops showed up. It seemed Sam had called 911 when she saw what was going on. Fortunately, they knew exactly who to arrest, despite the scene looking like Sam had beaten some people. After all, money talks, bullshit walks, and two could play that game.

In the end, thanks to Sam's awesome grandmother, Mr. and Mrs. Manson avoided jail time, but in exchange, they had to undergo lengthy, in-depth psychological care to try and get to the root of their apparent hatred of average people. I'm just glad that those two weren't in charge of anything that could majorly impact economic society or something! So far, those two haven't been completely cured. Probably never will be. Whatever's going on, it's very deep in there…

Which led to the hardest talk Sam and I ever had to do.

It was understandable. Psycho-snobs or not, they were still Sam's parents and she cared for them nonetheless. I guess it would do them good for me not to be around to agitate them further… Out of sight, out of mind, right? But more importantly, she and I had a couple of dates since that incident. I guess I could understand what she ended up telling me, as she seemed distant throughout. At one point, when we kissed, she seemed miserable. When we had our 'talk', she told me that… well… let's just say that she can't help but think of the incident whenever we try to get romantic…

Ironic that Mr. and Mrs. Manson would get their one wish anyway…

But I understood. Hey, how couldn't I when I have a sister that keeps droning on about how things affect the mind, right? And I couldn't stand to think of the idea of me making her miserable. She deserves to have a guy whose very presence won't cause her to bring up bad memories…

So we split and agreed to be best friends again. To cut the fat: Time passed, her parents got better (well, mostly anyway… They're still quite anti-poor-people.), Sam felt 100% comfortable around me again, but we both moved on. Well, at least I did. Part of me will always have a soft spot for her and I think the same goes for her about me… You never forget your firsts. But we've had our time. She's her own woman and I eventually found someone new…

-Back to present, normal P.O.V-

Ember had laid herself down, her head resting on Danny's lap as she listened to his tale. Nonplussed would be a good way to describe her facial expression as Danny finished his tale. Danny glanced down at his lover as he waited for a response, any response.

"Damn… And here I thought some of us ghosts were the worst examples of obsessive insanity. But it's easy to forget where that insanity originally came from, huh?" Ember mused thoughtfully. Danny nodded, opting to rest his voice after all that talking.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry you two couldn't work through it. Some might call your Goth a little weak for letting the 'rents get to her like that. Part of me kinda thinks so… I mean, you two were in the right. Screw thinking about their problems!"

"Ember!" Danny protested, but was immediately silenced when Ember placed a finger on his lips, warningly shaking her head slowly.

"Let me finish, Dipstick… I get it, though. Family… Guess that's important to most people, no matter what bullshit comes through. Heh, I just hope she sticks to her guns about dating anybody she wants." Ember said, taking the finger off his mouth when she finished speaking.

"Knowing Sam, she will. Believe me." Danny answered with a knowing smirk. Ember lifted herself up from her comfortable position and stood up. Danny watched her as she moved over to her instrument rack, looking like she was musing over her options of instruments.

"Ember?"

"You know what could help us feel better? I feel like a song… And I think I know a good one and where to play it." Ember answered. Danny had no trouble recognizing the tone of voice she used. Time for trouble, apparently…

10 minutes later, Danny and Ember materialized in a blue wall of fire onto a familiar street. Sam's street… Sure enough, a few houses down from their position was the Manson mansion. Danny gulped, not used to the idea of sudden public displays like what Ember had planned. Was it worth possibly being busted for disturbing the peace? Maybe. Didn't stop him from being shy about it, though.

"Relax, Baby-Pop. Don't think about it as 'freaking people out'. Consider it 'showing our mutual friend our support'."

"Support?"

"Yeah. Did you notice the way she looked at us when we went out today? I have a feeling she hasn't completely moved on… Not jealous or anything, more like she wishes things turned out differently. I just wanna show her that she can still rock on and find someone." Ember explained as she quietly tuned her guitar.

"And what happens if she notices us jamming together and takes your 'support' as 'us rubbing her nose in our relationship'? I mean, come on. This seems a little out-there." the halfa griped, absently tuning his own Ember-made guitar. He wasn't the best at the electric guitar, but he was learning.

"Well then, that's what happens." Ember shrugged. Danny shook his head. His current girlfriend could be just as stubborn as his former love. Perhaps Danny had a thing for independent women? Seemed like it. "Besides, I got a good song for this. It's a good point and it shows that no matter what trouble goes down in life, you gotta keep rocking. Know what I mean?"

Danny was briefed on the song choice and it seemed agreeable, if a little heavy in lyric. He wasn't sure how good he could follow along on his guitar, though. Still, his biggest issue was causing too big a scene, which was odd for somebody that continuously makes waves by fighting crime… One would think Danny would believe himself to have earned the right to make at least one surprise public spectacle.

With a sudden hit of a guitar riff, Ember decided to start the local show. She grabbed the mic. Speakers seemed to appear out of nowhere, even though Ember had actually summoned them from her stash of equipment back home. A nifty skill to have for setting up… "Ladies and Gentlemen, if I may take your attention away from your monotonous evening activities please! My name is Ember McLain, rock star, and out of the badness of my heart, I have decided to give a free performance to this nice little neighborhood! One song though, so get the wax outta your ears!"

She started to float down the street, hovering high enough so that cars could just drive on underneath her. Danny quickly followed until he was hovering aside her. "Anyways, I'm sure you know my partner-in-music here. After all, he saves your asses every day. Danny Phantom, everyone! So you got no reason to bust me for anything, we're here to rock, nothing more!"

Meanwhile, Sam watched the two specters floating along her street, having been roused from her activity by Ember's yelling. She wondered why the musical ghost suddenly wanted to play here of all places. As it stood, people began exiting their homes to check out the 'free show'. After all, if Phantom was around, who would hurt them?

"As to why we chose this quaint area, well, I'd like to dedicate this song to a friend of ours. Well, actually, a really good friend of Danny's. I couldn't help but notice she seemed a little down and I thought a song might cheer her up a little. So, HEY SAM! I hope I chose well, 'cause this one's for you!"

And so, the two ghosts began to jam out to Neil Young's "Rockin' In The Free World". An odd choice, considering the tragic verses of anarchy and social problems. But the chorus was Ember's main point. Sometimes you just gotta 'keep on rockin' in the free world'. Besides, to Ember's credit, she thought the song would appeal to Sam's rebellious interests…

Sam couldn't help but smile, it was a good song to play. She watched Danny humorously try to improvise some 'rock star' poses and movements as he played with Ember, but of course, he couldn't hold a candle to the expert rock diva. Still, the boy always did tend to put in an effort on things… The superhero skills and instincts didn't instantly come with the powers, after all. She had to snicker when she heard her dad bellow out a window for the specters to "turn that awful garbage down". At least he didn't snap again… No, he was better now.

"Having fun, Sammy?" a voice said from behind her, specifically the direction of her bed. Sam's smile remained.

"Yeah. I'm feeling better now. And don't call me Sammy…" the Goth answered, not taking her eyes off the rock show floating along the street.

"Danny always did know how to cheer people up." Sam's companion answered, moving up behind Sam to get a glimpse of the free concert.

"I get the feeling Ember was the mastermind here. Danny never did like the idea of randomly drawing attention to himself." Sam said, smirking. Her friend put arms around her from behind.

"Yeah. Being bullied a lot in school will do that to someone. At least that's what I hear." said the companion.

"Ah, well… I should thank those two next time I see them. Decent song choice, considering it's Ember… Guess I wasn't as subtle as I thought." Sam said, heaving a sigh. Truth be told, she honestly did miss having Danny as a boyfriend and there were times she wanted him back. But such is life. She moved on too, for the most part.

"It's alright." the friend replied, sounding chipper. "No harm in still loving him, Sammy. It's not like it was either of your faults for breaking up. Life just happened to be the way it is. That's all."

"Yeah. I'll give ya that. And what did I say about calling me that?" Sam said, mockingly shaking off her companion's lingering hug. This was certainly an interesting situation… But there would be time for proper explanations to Danny, Ember, and Tucker later. Sam resolved to just enjoy the show and keep on rockin' in her free world.

**Author's Note**: And there it is! The fate of Danny/Sam. At least it's a mutual break-up, as opposed to some of the more-common reasons for not having D/S. Also, I thought it'd be cool to see what would happen if Sam's parents really got aggressive about breaking up Danny and Sam. Guess my mind thinks the snobs would eventually go crazy. Oh well. I hope this chapter's good. I kinda have a little reservations about it, thinking that I could do a little better. But I think it's the tale to tell, so I'll leave it to you reviewers out there!

Also, I apologize for not typing out the lyrics of "Rockin' In The Free World". I was trying to not make this a songfic, although there's nothing wrong with that. Even so, I recommend you check the song out on YouTube or something. It's a pretty good classic rock tune. If anybody thinks that I should make this a songfic and type out the lyrics, let me know and I'll consider making the necessary edits and repost this.

As for Sam, I have a thought. I obviously hinted that Sam had possibly found someone new (or did she?). Here's my conundrum: I was toying with the idea of having this series also have a Dani/Sam lesbian pairing. Yeah, I know. Odd, right? But here's my logic. 1) Dani was originally intended to be a clone of Danny, right down to the gender, right? But she came out a girl. So, with everything else about her being Danny-like, wouldn't it kinda make sense for her to have the same feelings for Sam that Danny did? And 2) Well, at least this way, Sam still gets to be with her best friend. It's just a very strange, roundabout way of it. Not to mention, Dani seems like a likable girl anyway.

So I will create a totally new Poll asking whether to actually make Sam/Dani happen, keep her straight by pairing her with another guy, or just leave her single (and say that her companion at the end of this chapter was just Dani sleeping over as a friend). If you want, you could add in your thoughts on my idea in your review (along with what you thought about this chapter, of course).

Speaking of which, please review! Please?

Next up: Ember gives Danny a hell of a Halloween surprise! What happens? Wait and see.


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